The Experiment
by Sillabub7
Summary: After an experiment caused by Mayuri Kurotsuchi, most of the Gotei 13's captains have been turned into children! What horrors will ensue? And can he create a cure before it's too late? Takes place shortly before the beginning of Bleach. Now complete.
1. How It Began

First story! Possibly my only, I just really wanted to write this! I rarely get inspiration, so please enjoy!

After an experiment caused by Mayuri Kurotsuchi, most of the Gotei 13's captains have been turned into children! What horrors will ensue? And can he create a cure before it's too late? Takes place before the Rescue Arc. Has Ichimaru, Aizen, and Tousen in it. Very mild language.

Oh, and I don't own Bleach.

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><p>The Experiment<p>

Chapter 1: How It Began

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><p><strong>Day 1<strong>

"Quick, Nemu! You useless swine, where is it? I'll be late!" Mayuri Kurotsuchi was getting impatient. After all of this research, all of this preparation, too! His guinea pigs were within reach, and his experiment still needed final touches!

"Here, Master." Nemu handed her captain the vial.

Kurotsuchi swept off without another word.

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><p>Once again, Kurotsuchi was impatient. Yamamoto was speaking in his slow voice about strange hollow attacks or whatever. Kurotsuchi knew he should be paying attention, that these hollows would likely become his next pet project, but God damn it, how was he supposed to concentrate when he was on the brink of a scientific breakthrough? With that thought, Kurotsuchi cleared his throat.<p>

"Ahem."

Twelve sets of surprised eyes turned on him. What swine. He detested them all in one way or another. Kuchiki, for his condescension. Unohana, for "saving the lives" of his experiments, charmingly referred to by her as "victims." And Zaraki…what can you say about an oaf? Kurotsuchi had to admit, though, he did admire the certain _je ne sais quoi_ about Zaraki. Something about his sadism, love of violence, and altogether madness rolled together into a signature eau de Zaraki that appealed to him. Regardless, Kurotsuchi didn't fear any of them. He continued, undeterred.

"I apologize for this interruption, Head Captain Yamamoto." Kurotsuchi began. Although he didn't want to, Kurotsuchi needed to act polite in the presence of Yamamoto. It may save his life in the chaos sure to follow.

"Setting aside for a moment these attacks, which are surely an important matter requiring the intelligence of each and every captain of the Gotei 13, I am giving you all an invitation."

Surprise and vague curiosity turned to suspicion. Pity, they've learned of his tricks. No matter. Not much they can do to stop him.

"Captain Kurotsuchi, we don't-" began Sosuke Aizen.

"An invitation for discovery. A chance to open the door to a level of science you never dreamed existed." Kurotsuchi pressed onward, pretending for the sake of his speech that the captain's interruption had instead gone along the lines of "Invitation? For what?".

"Look, we don't want to participate in another one of your experiments. Head Captain, I apologize, but I'm leaving for my safety's sake." Komamura said gruffly, moving for the door. It was sealed shut. He began to frantically beat on the door, other captains moving to help. Byakuya Kuchiki released Senbonzakura, to no avail. Not that anything could break down that door. It was sealed from the outside by Nemu, and she would only open it on his command.

"Captain Kurot-" Yamamoto began to reprimand him, but Kurotsuchi wasn't going to let him finish. Springing towards the head captain, he sprayed Yamamoto in the face with a purplish mist, immediately causing him to fall unconscious. He turned and quickly did the same to Yamamoto's ever-present lieutenant, Sasakibe.

"Now that I have your attention." Kurotsuchi said, reaching into his shihakusho's sleeve. He pulled out his creation, and set it on the ground in the middle of the room. All eyes turned towards it. Kurotsuchi quickly injected himself with a syringe, and pressed a button on the device. And all was chaos.

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><p>I promise the chapters will get longer.<p> 


	2. Return From Oblivion

A slightly longer chapter this time. I really like writing this story, and I've got several chapters down. But it seems like I write so much more! Two pages of writing on Microsoft Word turns out to be hardly enough to warrant scrolling when it actually gets put up here.

I don't own Bleach. I'm not sure if a disclamer is necessary, this being FANFICTION, but everyone else does it. So I'll just stay on the safe side. I don't want to get this taken down because of copyright laws or something.

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><p>The Experiment<p>

Chapter 2: Return From Oblivion

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><p><strong>Day 1<strong>

…

"Nemu, Nemu! He's stirring! Press the 'Record' button!"

Toshiro Hitsugaya was having a bad day. It was enough that his lieutenant came in, hungover, to work this morning. Nothing new, of course. She does it every day. That doesn't mean that Hitsugaya doesn't have the right to be angry at it. Right now, however, he was feeling good. When Kurotsuchi's device went off, it released a white explosion, quickly followed by darkness. Hitsugaya felt like he was floating. Sure, he was aware that Matsumoto was probably passed out in his office, but his anger was…gone. He was in a dream-like state, and that's where he wanted to stay.

But good things never last. Hitsugaya _knew_ that he was supposed to be distressed about something. Maybe something to do with the pinching sensation in his forearm("Nemu, I have another blood sample for you…")? He didn't know. Kurotsuchi's voice was _so_ distracting, too. Hitsugaya felt…

…

Kurotsuchi! _Now_ he remembered. That bastard did something. With that thought, Hitsugaya's eyes snapped open. He was lying on his back in the dimly lit room of the Captain's Meeting Room.

"…eyes are open, and he shows some disorientation…" Kurotsuchi went on. Hitsugaya focused on him. Such a pest…If he did anything physical to him, he would…

"Hitsugaya, tell me how many fingers I am holding up," Kurotsuchi finally addressed him. Hitsugaya ignored him, pushing himself up despite Nemu's protests. A wave of nausea gripped him and, turning onto his side, vomited into Kurotsuchi's lap.

"Why, you-!" A hard blow struck Hitsugaya's face, and he descended back into the blessed darkness.

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><p>"Ukitake, can you tell me how many fingers I am holding up?" Jushiro Ukitake opened his eyes blearily. He felt…good, actually. Better than he had in many years.<p>

"Three…Kurotsuchi…" Ukitake managed, his voice sounding off to his own ears.

"No voice imperfections, seems to be relatively focused…" Kurotsuchi had moved on to another, taking the strong smell of sick with him. Ukitake turned his head. Twelve bodies were spread around him, beginning to stir. But they were….Ukitake sat up carefully to get a better look. He couldn't believe it. Beside him was his fellow captain, Soi Fon. The resemblance was unmistakable…but he was looking at a child! No more than three or four years old, in a bundle of cloth too big for her, was Soi Fon.

"A surprising twist in this experiment, I have learned that Captain Komamura possesses canine features, probably unrelated to the drug... Ah, said captain has apparently awoken from his stupor long enough to scramble back into his helmet." Kurotsuchi's monologue interrupted him from his wonder. Ukitake looked around. All of his fellow captains save Yamamoto and Kurotsuchi, had been turned into children! Even Hitsugaya, and he didn't have much height to spare!

Ukitake at last remembered to look down at himself. Yes, even he was a part of this. He raised a tiny hand in front of him experimentally. This…won't be good. Wait, his hair was dark again and he couldn't remember the last time he'd been able to breathe this well! This was, at the very least, a nice twist in an otherwise uncomfortable story. He may even begin to like this change. Ukitake's rambling mind was cut short as all of the children began to move about. Confusion turned to exclamation, which turned to outrage at a surprising rate.

"Silence!" Yamamoto had gotten to his feet, helped by his lieutenant. They were, physically at least, unaffected by this strange turn of events. "Captain Kurotsuchi, fix this at once!" For once, Yamamoto's normally droning voice was sharp.

"Fix? After all the trouble I underwent to perform this experiment, you want me to fix this without even being able to properly examine my subjects?" Kurotsuchi began indignantly.

The silence was answer enough.

"'Fixing' them is not as simple as it seems. I would need at least a month-"

"A month? Why you-" Soi Fon had found her voice. Her signature braids had come undone. She launched herself at Kurotsuchi, only to be restrained by Nemu.

"Captain Soi Fon! Calm yourself!" Yamamoto commanded. "Captain Unohana, can _you_ fix this?"

A small girl was slowly getting to her feet. "I don't believe so, Head Captain. Not without knowing, at the very least, what he did to cause this. And at any rate, I am not a researcher. I am a healer." Unohana answered slowly.

"This is a grave matter-" Yamamoto's voice had returned to its slow drone.

"Grave matter? Look at me! How am I thupposed to…" Clutching her now much-too-big clothes about herself, Soi Fon began to shriek. Her anger quickly rose to the point that she lost the ability to make coherent sentences. She clearly decided to cut diplomacy and go straight to...

"Thting all enemieth to death, Thuth…"

Soi Fon's anger dissipated in a second, replaced by confusion. Ukitake sympathized. He too had realized that he could no longer remember his zanpakuto's name.

"Ah, as expected, subjects have lost their ability to release their zanpakutos. Most likely, they have forgotten the names of their zanpakutos altogether." Kurotsuchi's glee was evident. "Subjects' reiatsu has greatly diminished as well. Truly, they are as powerful as five year olds…" Kurotsuchi paused. "Three year olds, in the case of Subject Soi Fon. Subject Soi Fon appears to have developed a speech impediment, and-"

"Kurotsuchi, that is enough!" Yamamoto cried, forgetting honorifics in his anger. His eyes were open. "Are you meaning to tell us that they are unable to even use shunpo?"

"Could any of you use shunpo when you were your current age?" Kurotsuchi asked them.

The silence was enough.

"Then, yes, Head Captain."

Yamamoto sighed. "You will set aside all other duties, and work solely on a solution to this problem. Until such a solution arrives," Yamamoto turned to the children. "Your respective lieutenants and lower seated officers will care for you and be Acting Captains." Grumbling protests all around. "You, of course, will make the final decisions. As for your punishment, Kurotsuchi," He said, returning his gaze to the Twelfth division captain. "We will decide your fate when you have cured your fellow captains. Pray that they are not needed in the next month."

"Yes, Head Captain." Kurotsuchi said meekly. Ukitake could see that he was merely acting demure. His best chance at staying a captain of the Gotei 13 was to stay on Yamamoto's good side. "Indeed, I have sent Hell Butterflies to their respective caretakers."

"Very good. Captains, you will continue along as best as you can. You are dismissed." With a bang of his staff, this…odd meeting was adjourned.


	3. After School Special

Chapter Three is up! I'm trying to keep them coming at a regular pace, around every 5 days. My school starts today! Yay! I have class only three days a week, and at night, so it shouldn't affect my writing too much. But then again, I've been on long enough to know that promises regarding uploads are not always kept. Often, I see stories abandoned after promising they'll upload faster. But anyway. I promise I have several more chapters written, just in case I don't have time to write that much.

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><p>The Experiment<p>

Chapter 3: After School Special

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><p><strong>Day 1<strong>

Byakuya Kuchiki was annoyed. That clown bastard had…no matter. It was useless feeling angry if you couldn't even take revenge. Byakuya had trouble even drawing his sword. But he wasn't angry. He was _annoyed._ He was annoyed that he and his fellow captains had to wait outside the First division like _children_ waiting for their _parents_ to pick them up from day care!

He cast aside his anger, ahem, annoyance. It was beneath him.

Soifon had refused any help and stalked off toward the Second Division before her incompetent lieutenant could arrive. Byakuya would have done the same, but his division was a lot farther away and he couldn't properly defend himself, now could he? He turned as the lieutenants of various divisions arrived at the First division. Lieutenant Shuhei Hisagi was in disbelief, but after a short explanation he shook his head, took Captain Kaname Tousen by the hand, and led him back to his division. Such was repeated for several captains. Gin Ichimaru was the only one to be jovial at this strange turn of events. He happily bounced ahead of Lieutenant Izuru Kira, who uncertainly jogged along after him. Kenpachi Zaraki, still the largest, went off with Lieutenant Yachiru Kusajishi, who was gleefully promising her "Ken-chan" that they would play. Luckily, she didn't notice Byakuya. Byakuya watched as Lieutenant Momo Hinamori and Lieutenant Rangiku Matsumoto arrived.

Hinamori spotted Captain Hitsugaya first. "Shiro-chan, what happened…" she trailed off as she spotted the captains that were left. Kurotsuchi was conveniently nowhere to be seen, having disappeared after assuring the children that he would work night and day for the cure…provided that they act like good little test subjects for him. Her eyes finally landed on Captain Sosuke Aizen.

"C-Captain Aizen!" She stammered. "What…?"

"Kurotsuchi happened to me, Hinamori. Now we need to go back to our division." Aizen answered wearily. Hinamori appeared to accept that she'd hear the story later. She quickly agreed and took Aizen by the hand.

"Bye, Shiro-chan!" She waved as she passed by Hitsugaya.

"It's Captain Hit-"

"Nope!" Hinamori interrupted, grinning broadly. "You're officially a child. I get to call you Shiro-chan all I want!"

"No, you can't! I am your superior, and…" Hitsugaya's protests were drowned out by Hinamori, who had let go of Aizen and put her hands over her ears, saying "La-la-la-la-I-can't-hear-you-la-la-la-la…"

Hitsugaya's anger turned to rage as he attempted to shout over Hinamori. Finally, he turned to his lieutenant, saying "Matsumoto! Momo is…"

His anger faded away as confusion spread over his four-year-old face. Matsumoto, who had until this point just giggled madly, picked Hitsugaya up, saying, "It's okay, Shiro, I'll protect you from mean old Momo. Don't be afraid!" And, cackling madly, she shunpoed off.

Hinamori and Aizen departed soon after. Kuchiki thought Hitsugaya's confusion was warranted, though. Although he always looked like a child, albeit an _older_ child, Hitsugaya was known for his maturity. Just now, he sounded…well, _childish_. What was going on?

Kuchiki's musings were cut short as his caretaker was arrived. "So sorry, Brother, but I was in the Rukongai when I got the message…" Rukia Kuchiki stopped short. She looked around. The only captan left was Byakuya Kuchiki himself.

"Rukia. Take me back to my division."

"…Brother?"

"Yes. Now, go."

Rukia wisely chose not to ask questions. They walked toward their destination in silence, until…

"It was Kurotsuchi, all right? And he did something to me that made my abilities regress to the state they were in as a child. I can't do anything. You're going to have to help me in the next month…" Byakuya went on. Something was off. He wasn't normally this talkative, or prone to outbursts.

"Brother, I can't! I'm being sent to the world of the living tomorrow, remember?"

Blast. The one time he was caught without a lieutenant, he was turned into a child!

"Very well. I will make do with my subordinates." Before all this happened, he was content to go for a while without a new lieutenant. There were too few that were powerful enough for the position, and even fewer were unsuitable for life in the sixth division. The most promising was Renji Abarai, from the Eleventh Division. Byakuya supposed he would have to approach him for the position.

They arrived at the Sixth Division, and Rukia bade him goodbye, clearly eager to leave. Doubtless she was uncertain as to how to treat him. For the best, really. He walked into the division, ignoring the stares as he unlocked his office and went inside. He threw aside his overlarge haori in _annoyance_ and sat at his desk, which too was overlarge. His useless third seat came in, but before he could question his captain, Byakuya ordered him to send a Hell Butterfly to Abarai. The third seat, despite not recognizing him, understood that the boy was someone to be obeyed, he immediately stammered and backed out. Byakuya sighed. Why had he chosen such a spineless shinigami for a high-ranking officer?

With nothing else to do, Byakuya turned to the stack of paperwork on his desk. He prepared to begin the tedious task.

Only one problem…

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><p>(AN) I've decided that some captains won't have as big of a part as others. I don't see interesting ways to tell Ichimaru's, Aizen's, Komamura's, and Tousen's stories. I'll try to mention them in passing, but there probably won't be parts of this from their perspectives.


	4. Uh Oh

Shepard Cousland- I seriously considered your request to "put Gin in he could team up with [Yachiru] and do pranks" and I decided to grant it! I already have Yachiru in my story(You'll have to read a few more chapters to meet her), and I was going to retire her afterwards. But now, I realize that not including our favorite troublemaker more in the story would be unforgivable. You'll have to wait a while, though… Keep reading!

CressidaRene- Wow, thanks for the review! To answer your question(**And everyone should read this for clarification! I might not even explain it in the story!**), the captain's new ages are directly related to the amount of dosage received. Soi Fon was physically closest to the device, so she was the youngest(3-ish?). Kenpachi and Komamura were by the door, trying to break it down. They were the farthest away, so they're the oldest, around 7 or 8. Their actual ages, personalities and life experiences are related to their…shall we say maturity? And how fast said maturity degrades...:) If that explanation doesn't do it for you, then let's just say that Mayuri designed the potion to be more effective to some than others. Read more!

KurosakiCrystal18-Thank you again for telling me about the duplicate chapters!

Edits to the story- As I'm writing this, the timeline is getting a bit wonky, so I'm going to start chapters with **"Day x"**

I'm releasing a super long chapter! By my standards at least. I've got like 9k more words already written, but I like to keep several chapters ahead of the game. So my releases are going to be pretty much write-a-chapter-release-a-chapter like everyone else, rather than a fixed schedule.

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><p>The Experiment<p>

Chapter 4: Uh Oh...

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><p><strong>Day 1<strong>

**From the perspective of a nameless, seatless shinigami of the Ten****th**** Division.**

Ah, relaxation. Honestly, he couldn't remember the last time he'd experienced it. Probably during the last captain's meeting. Captain's Meetings are the only times when Captain Hitsugaya was guaranteed to not be around. Damn, it seemed like even when he wasn't working, the little captain was telling him to clean the barracks, or run a message.

But not now. These precious minutes were his.

His bliss was too soon cut short, with the return of the Tenth division lieutenant. She was whooping and hollering. Drunk again no doubt. At least she could be counted on to sell him the good stuff. But wait…Who was on her shoulders, protesting? The captain! Back early?

But he looked…younger than usual. The shinigami shook his head. Probably just his imagination. The captain has always looked like a child. He probably just imagined him older because the captain was so powerful. It's easy to forget that he's a child.

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><p>Hitsugaya's day was going from bad to worse.<p>

First, Kurotsuchi hit him. He now sported an ugly bruise on his jaw. He'd have to see Unohana later. Not that she could do anything, as she was as powerless as he was.

Speaking of powerless, Matsumoto had swept him off his feet and onto her shoulders the minute she saw him. She was now shunpoing towards his office, giggling. And she was going too…damn…fast!

"Matsumoto! Slow down!" She ignored him. Actually, she possibly sped up. The world swept by Hitsugaya in a blur. He spotted some lowly shinigami lounging about like he didn't have anything better to do, but Matsumoto was deaf to his orders to stop so he could reprimand him. The guy looked like he was scared to death of being caught, anyway.

Eventually they arrived at their office. Once inside, Matusmoto let him go. A wave of nausea gripped him, and he had to fight to stay on his feet. Once it passed, Hitsugaya locked them in in the hope that Matsumoto might actually do paperwork. She just smirked slightly and laid down on the couch despite his orders to get up. He sighed. He definitely needed a better lieutenant.

At least he wasn't the youngest anymore. _That_ honor goes directly to Soi Fon.

With some difficulty, Hitsugaya climbed onto his chair. It was already a child's desk and chair, he had it custom made after the desk he inherited from his predecessor turned out to be too big. Now his desk dwarfed him yet again. Hitsugaya gritted his teeth. He climbed down again, and got a few of the heavy books from the lowest shelf of his bookcase. He placed them in a tower on his chair, and again climbed up. That was better. Now for the paperwork.

It was no one's favorite task, including his, but it had to be done. He grabbed the first sheet.

He paused. And grabbed another. What's going on? He could see that there were words, but for the life of him he couldn't read them. He knew the letters, he knew them! But like trying to recall a dream upon waking, the meaning just slipped from his grasp. He looked up. Matsumoto was watching him with a drunken expression on her face. He refused to give her anything else to laugh at. He should at least _pretend_ to work.

But that was stupid! She'll have to find out eventually…no! He can take care of things himself. He's not a baby. Hitsugaya frowned. There it was again. Like that outburst he had when Momo was taunting him, he again slipped into thinking like a child. But…he thought that the changes were purely physical. But then Soi Fon couldn't remember her zanpakuto's name. Neither could he, for that matter. And Soi Fon's speech impediment… Something was wrong, but he'll be damned if he'll ever go to Kurotsuchi for help.

But back to the problem at hand. Paperwork. Hitsugaya found himself clumsily holding a pen. He could at least make a signature, right? He'll deal with the paperwork that only required his signature. He'll inform Matusmoto once he was finished. He put the pen to the signature line. And paused. How does his signature go? This is stupid! Write!

And so Hitsugaya wrote. But not signatures. He drew instead. Doodles upon doodles of stick figures and dragons and Hollows and cats. He drew until the paper was ruined.

Once he finished, he snapped back to himself. He stared in disbelief. How could he have had…such a lapse of judgment? God damn it, he wasn't a child!

He was tired. He needed to rest, that's all. Hitsugaya let his head fall onto his desk. Unbeknownst to him, Matsumoto crept up to him to examine his work. She stared for a few seconds, and a horrifying revelation seemed to strike her.

"Oh no…" She said.

"I'm going to have to do paperwork, aren't I?"

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><p>An hour later, Hitsugaya woke up. For a moment, he thought the day's events had been a dream. Nothing had changed. He wasn't sitting at his desk anymore. The tower of books had been cast aside onto the floor, and…Matsumoto was sitting at his desk!<p>

"Matsumoto…What are you doing?" He said, his voice still raspy from sleep.

"Paperwork, Captain." She said, not looking up.

Hitsugaya stared in silence for a while. Finally he managed to say,

"Are you dying?"

Matsumoto growled. "Two other people have come in asking that! No, I'm not dying! I'm trying to help my captain who will clearly need it in the next month if he can't do paperwork!"

She was clearly upset. He said, "Well, um…thank you."

That made her pause. Hitsugaya didn't know why he said it. She was doing paperwork, _his _paperwork no less, without him even having to ask. On top of that, she was probably working through the beginnings of a hangover. And she was angry. And he wanted her to be happy.

He went back to the desk and picked up a sheet of paper. The letters swarmed in his eyes. It was impossible to make sense of more than the basic words. It didn't help that he had a huge craving for…

Oh no.

Now that he thought about it, it was the only thing that he could think about, and if he actually asked for it…he would never live it down.

But the side of Hitsugaya that was appalled at the notion was fading.

"Matsumoto…can we take a break? I want to go to the Thirteenth Division."

Matsumoto was clearly surprised, but she would readily acquiesce to anything if it'd get her out of that room.

She took him where he wanted. She even let him walk there. They stopped outside of Ukitake's office, and parted, with Hitsugaya telling her to take an hour break. Again, he didn't know what made him say that. He knew that if he gave her an hour break she'd take three. But he thought she deserved something nice.

He timidly knocked on Ukitake's door. Ukitake's third seats, Kiyone Kotetsu and Sentaro Kotsubaki opened it.

"Ukitake…may I have a word in private?"

Ukitake looked different. His hair was dark again, and his face had some color. He smiled broadly.

"Of course! Please excuse us, Third Seats."

"Yes Captain!" They said simultaneously. They soon left, arguing with each other as usual.

"So, what brings you here Hitsugaya?" Ukitake smiled.

"This will be very embarrassing, but…I need…" Hitsugaya trailed off.

"Need?"

"Do-you-have-some-candy-that-I-ca-neat?" Hitsugaya said in a rush, his face growing hot.

Ukitake, taken aback, quickly said "Of course! Would you like some tea to go with it?"

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><p>Rangiku Matsumoto was confused. Her captain was acting so strange! Well, it was to be expected that if he was turned into a four-year-old, he would probably get a four-year-old's brain to go along with it. The captain was fighting it, but sooner or later he would succumb to a child's mentality. So she'd just have to go along for the ride.<p>

As of right now, she was drinking a bottle of sake to rid her of her hangover, and contemplating the day's events. The more time that passed, the more childish Hitsugaya would get, and she would have so much more work to do! Well, at least he rewarded her for doing some work. How long has it been anyway? Two hours? Three? Oh no!

Rangiku raced over to the Thirteenth Division, hoping that her captain was still there. What if he had gotten frustrated and left on his own? The Seireitei is no place for a child! She barged into Ukitake's office, ignoring the protests of the third seats waiting outside. She breathed a sigh of relief. He was here. Fast asleep on a couch, with candy all over his face, but at least he was here. He and Captain Ukitake had, from the looks of things, had a candy binge. Careful not to wake either of them, she picked Hitsugaya up and placed him on her back. She made her way back to the Tenth Division.

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><p>"So it's begun." Kurotsuchi grinned. "It's happening faster in others, but it's definitely happening. Their childish impulses are beginning to take control. Sleeping will certainly help the process." There's no way of knowing how this will end. Even if they are returned to their proper forms, it's possible that their childish side may consume them entirely.<p>

And Soul Society may never be the same.

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><p>Yes, I think Mayuri could be an awesome villain. But I'm not intending to make him completely evil. Just science-driven.<p> 


	5. An Offer for Renji

Hello all! Thank you for the lovely reviews, especially the people who review more than once! It gives me validation in my writing. I'm kind of weird about it; I just don't like people reading what I write. It's sort of a personal-space type of thing. I'm exactly the same way about my laundry. I freak out if people start poking around in it. It makes me happy that people like my work enough to keep commenting on it! So, review! Please!

Oh, and I'm totally okay with constructive criticisms and any questions you might have about the storyline! Also, any requests to include things in the story I will seriously consider! I have no idea how this story will finish up, so I'm open to suggestions! This time, I combined two smaller chapters to make a large chapter like the last one. Because "the weird dreamer" commented saying that the chapters were too short. Just so you know how serious I am.

My apologies, Robin aries26. This is mostly for "aww"s and laughs. The idea of an evil Mayuri is really cool, but Aizen will have Szayel later... Anyway, I really should get on with the story. This Author's Note is getting way too big.

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><p>The Experiment<p>

Chapter 5: An Offer for Renji/Yumichika's Sacrifice

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><p><strong>Day 1<strong>

Renji Abarai was walking towards the sixth division. It was late morning, and his captain hadn't shown up for work, which was unusual for him. With nothing to do for the day, Renji had been lounging about, drinking with his friends Ikkaku Madarame and Yumichika Ayasegawa. Then he had received the Hell Butterfly from Byakuya Kuchiki, ordering him to meet him at once. With no job to do first, and no captain to inform of his intentions, Renji immediately went to the sixth division. If he was lucky he might meet…never mind. Renji hadn't spoken to her in years. And she wasn't even in the sixth division! He had no reason to expect Rukia to be there. Besides, she's probably preparing to leave to the World of the Living.

Renji cast those thoughts aside. Ikkaku and Yumichika were beside him, apparently also having nothing better to do. They stopped outside of Kuchiki's office. After a series of whispered arguments, Renji finally convinced Ikkaku and Yumichika to go away. They wandered off, most likely to find a better drinking buddy. Rangiku, probably. Renji knocked on the door.

"Enter." Said a curiously high voice.

Renji opened the door, to find a young boy sitting atop Byakuya Kuchiki's desk. The boy glanced up, and Renji stared. The boy had long straight hair and grey eyes. He was wearing a much-too-large shihakusho and a green scarf wrapped around his neck. In all aspects, he looked like an extremely young Byakuya Kuchiki, around five years old. But that couldn't be.

"Who…are you?" Renji managed at last. The boy returned to his work. He was trying to write something, but clearly having trouble.

"Sit."

Nervously, Renji did as he was told. Something about this child clearly demanded respect. Perhaps he is another member of the Kuchiki clan. But isn't that scarf supposed to belong to the head of the clan? And Byakuya's signature hair pieces were lying on the desk next to the boy.

"As you may or may not have guessed, based on your intellect, I am Byakuya Kuchiki. Due to an unfortunate…accident caused by that bas…Mayuri Kurotsuchi, and he will pay for it, I have been turned into a child for the time being." Renji continued to stare. This was Captain Byakuya Kuchiki, one of the most respected captains of the Gotei 13? He certainly acted like it, with the way he never met Renji's eyes. But that outburst was decidedly uncharacteristic of him.

"I have been rendered incapable of doing the most basic tasks expected of a shinigami," he continued. "Even my ability to read and write has been severely impaired. As such, I have been forced to place most of my duties on my subordinates."

Renji was fairly sure he knew where this was going.

"I do not, however, have a lieutenant to take care of the brunt of the work. I have therefore decided to request you to take the place as the lieutenant of the sixth division. As a lieutenant, you would do the work expected of a lieutenant and, for a month, a large portion of my own. Your pay would be…" Renji zoned out. A chance to work with Byakuya Kuchiki? To learn from him? To finally, after all these years, beat him?

"I accept."

That made Kuchiki look up at last. "You will move into the lieutenant's quarters on the morrow, but you will start immediately. You also have permission to speak freely about my…predicament."

He couldn't have stopped Renji from doing that even if he wanted to.

"Yes, Captain."

"Your position as lieutenant is not guaranteed. If your work is satisfactory by the end of the month you will be officially promoted."

"Yes, Captain."

"To start, you need to complete this paperwork." Byakuya said, pointing to the stack of paperwork beside him. "Anything requiring my seal will need to be read aloud to me."

"Yes, Captain."

"Before you do all of that, go to my manor, to contact my tailor and have him be at the manor at the end of the day, so he can get proper fittings for my new clothing and haori."

"Yes, Captain."

* * *

><p>Yumichika walked back towards the Eleventh Division, Ikkaku stumbling along behind him. It was noon. With no captain, there were no orders. They started out drinking with Renji, but he left. Ikkaku proclaimed that since they didn't have a third to their party, he would "drink for two."<p>

After he started doing that, however, he forgot that he was only drinking for himself and the missing friend. He started refusing to let Yumichika have a drink. Yumichika didn't mind. Alcohol aged you horribly. Using the old "Why is the sake ALWAYS gone?"(A/N PotC, anyone? XD) routine, Yumichika eventually managed to convince Ikkaku not to pass out and come back to the Eleventh with him. Yumichika really didn't want to carry him. It just wasn't attractive.

Though the lack of alcohol was a good enough excuse for Ikkaku, Yumichika had other things in mind. He wanted to get to the bottom of this. Rumors were spreading like crazy; It was only noon, and already four separate ugly shinigami had dared to approach Yumichika and Ikkaku asking if it was true that his captain got caught up in one of the mad scientist's schemes, and that he was turned into a baby. Yumichika was spared from having to look at them for very long; Ikkaku was not a happy drunk, and one look at _his_ face was enough to send them running.

The duo arrived at their division; Ikkaku, who couldn't hold out any longer, passed out underneath a scarred tree. Yumichika dragged him into the shade, and sat down beside him.

And waited for his captain to show up for work.

He didn't have to wait long. Soon, the unmistakable sound of his lieutenant's voice reached him.

"Come on, Ken-chan! I told you it was this way!"

So that's where they were. Yachiru had gone to find Kenpachi, and the two of them had gotten lost on the way back. Yachiru's presence filled the air, though she wasn't in sight yet. But if she was talking to Kenpachi, then where was he? Yumichika couldn't sense him. His reiatsu was so vast; you could always tell when he was coming.

Ah, there it was. If he concentrated, Yumichika could sense his captain's spiritual pressure. But it was so faint…

Yachiru came into view. She was trying to drag another small figure along with her. Who was it? A boy…A boy wearing a haori.

Could his suspicions really be true?. Yumichika stayed where he was. He just wanted to observe them.

The children passed. Neither of them (Assuming, of course, that the boy was Kenpachi Zaraki) was very good at picking up reiatsu, even one as familiar as Yumichika's, so he felt pretty safe following them. He abandoned Ikkaku under the tree to sleep off the effects of the sake.

He followed them to the designated Sparring Area. Unofficially, all of the Eleventh Division was used for sparring. The Sparring Area was used for training and for division meetings. A crowd was gathering there.

"Now, if yer done starin' and bettin', fight me!" The boy was saying. The shinigami surrounding him and the gleeful lieutenant guiltily stopped exchanging money. Apparently, while Yumichika and Ikkaku were gone, the division had started a large pool.

Yumichika turned his attention back to the boy. He had a large shihakusho comically tied around him. It had frayed ends, like someone had hacked off the parts that were too long. His haori was frayed too. He had long, dirty, spiked hair and a crazed look in his eyes. His captain...as a seven year old child. His captain wasn't beautiful even back when he was a kid, Yumichika noticed distastefully. Kids just aren't supposed to look bloodthirsty. His signature bells were gone, and his eyepatch was slung about his neck like a necklace. His scars were gone, too.

"Um, Captain…" A massive shinigami began. "You're a kid…"

"Do you have a problem with that?" Zaraki growled.

"And your reiatsu is gone, too…" he was clearly uncomfortable.

Zaraki was clearly tired of listening. Drawing his sword, he launched himself at the shinigami…only to be restrained by his subordinates. He then did what no one expected of Kenpachi Zaraki.

He threw a temper tantrum.

His face turned red and he started yelling. His reiatsu rose significantly. Well…it was no "Captain" level, but it was good enough for a lowly Fourth Division shinigami.

Yumichika made his move. Grabbing his captain around the waist, he picked him up and shunpoed far away to a rooftop, Yachiru staying behind to bark orders at the assembled shinigami.

He knelt down in front of his captain, who had tears in his eyes. He wasn't crying, really. Just crocodile tears.

"Captain, when will you be fixed?" Yumichika asked intensely.

Yumichika ended up hearing the full story of the morning's events on the top of that building. A month…A month with a whining, crying, fight-obsessed captain, and a lieutenant that was supposedly Acting Captain.

This month was going to make him ugly… As much as he'd like to, he can't ignore the obvious flaws in this plan. He had to take charge, even if it meant sacrificing his beauty. Yumichika made a decision. He sighed and stood. He held a hand out to Captain Zaraki.

"Come on, Captain. Let's get you some fitting clothes. Where do you go to get Yachiru's?"

An hour later, Zaraki now had some better fitting shihakushos. They returned to the Eleventh division to find Yachiru trying to train the shinigami assembled there. Yumichika managed to distract her from that, and got the Seventh seat to take over for her. Yachiru and "Ken-chan" ran off, probably to play.

It was only after he had gone to Zaraki's office to inform the shinigami who were in charge of doing the bulk of the captain and lieutenant paperwork of the recent changes that he remembered Ikkaku. He wearily trudged back to the scarred tree.

But Ikkaku was nowhere to be seen.

* * *

><p>I realize that, in the real story, Renji was given a letter stating his promotion, but if he can't read or write, how can Byakuya draft a letter? Unless he dictates it to a scribe or something, but something tells me that Byakuya doesn't want to be seen by many.<p>

Imagine this: A tearful seven-year-old version of Kenpachi Zaraki on the top of a building, with a serious, intense looking Yumichika crouched in front of him, looking up at his face. Perhaps there's a setting sun somewhere in the background, too. I would LOVE to see a drawing of THAT.


	6. The Many Trials of Rangiku Matsumoto

I don't really think that I'm that funny. But I do occasionally find myself smiling at the scenarios that I write. Enjoy!

* * *

><p>The Experiment<p>

Chapter 6: The Many Trials of Rangiku Matsumoto

* * *

><p><strong>Day 1(Don't worry, it's getting close to the end of Day 1)<strong>

Rangiku was hard at work with paperwork, _again_. This time it was slightly more fun, since she was a little drunk. Hitsugaya was sleeping off his sugar binge on the Tenth division couch this time. The office was locked, so that no one could gawk at him. Gossip was spreading, and not even fear of their captain's icy wrath could stop them from trying to sneak a peek. Not that Hitsugaya actually had any icy wrath at the moment, but she sure as hell wasn't going to tell anyone that. She needed to protect her captain from embarrassment. If she didn't, he'd take it out on her when he returned to normal. Rangiku was fed up with all the hushed comments anyway. Thank goodness for locks-

The door opened, to reveal a clearly drunk Ikkaku.

"How did you…!" Rangiku was shocked beyond words.

"I have the spare key you 'lost'." Ikkaku said, smirking. So _that's _where it went. She'd spent forever trying to find that thing. She even got him to help her search for it! And then she paid him for his silence so that her captain wouldn't find out that a spare key to the office was floating around. That jerk!

"Give me that! And get out! I can't drink with you right now!" Rangiku cried, rising from the chair.

He tossed it over. "I already made a copy…" he said faintly.

He was staring down at her sleeping captain. True, he didn't look very different from how he was before. Toshiro's face was largely the same, the only differences being that it had regained its baby fat and that the seriousness normally found on it had vanished. He was lying in the fetal position on the couch, Hyourinmaru wrapped in his arms like a teddy bear.

"So the rumors are true! All of the captains! Lucky, lucky, lucky!" In his excitement (or maybe drunkenness), Ikkaku forgot to form coherent sentences.

"All right, what do you want in exchange for your silence?" Rangiku said, exasperated.

"Forget it, Ran. Nothin' you can do or threaten to do can stop me! Lucky, lucky!" Ikkaku was doing some sort of mad jive, then stumbled and quit. Rangiku sighed. She knew what she had to do.

She began to undo the top of her shihakusho… only to sigh again as he didn't so much as look up.

"Make your short jokes and then get out of here!" Rangiku shouted.

"But he's…so…CUTE!" Ikkaku said without a trace of a slur. He continued excitedly, until…

"…Rangiku? What's happening? Why is he…?" Rangiku never answered. This was possibly the first time her captain had ever called her by her first name. Toshiro rubbed his eyes sleepily.

Another cry of "CUTE!" jolted Rangiku out of her thoughts. With an angry threat to release Haineko, she finally got Ikkaku out of there. Now, on top of everything, she was going to have to change the locks, too. In the meanwhile, Toshiro (Rangiku vaguely noticed that she had stopped thinking of him as 'Captain' a while ago. He was just too cute to be called Captain.) had sat up, still in his overlarge shihakusho. She'd have to get him to a tailor tomorrow. There aren't many child-sized shinigami in Soul Society, so those that were children have to have their clothing specially made.

"…Rangiku?"

She was again lost in thought, staring at Toshiro. She had to stop doing that. Toshiro coughed slightly, causing Rangiku to sit beside him on the couch and rub his back.

"Hey, Captain, did you have a nice nap?" She asked quietly. She may not address him in her thoughts as 'Captain', but she definitely knew her place.

"Yeah…how did I get here?"

"You fell asleep while you were playing with Captain Ukitake. I took you here so I could get some work done."

"Okay. Thanks." What had sleep done to him? It was like he'd forgotten that he'd spent all these years insisting that he be treated like an adult! Maybe sleep had caused his mind to settle more fully within his body.

If she was going to take care of him in the next month, she was going to benefit from it. She slowly got a camera out of her shihakusho. It was an issued one given to her by the Shinigami Women's Association, part of some gimmick to raise money. It was a tiny one, perfect for snapping on the spot photos. She raised it to her face.

_Click._

Perfect. Toshiro was still rubbing his eyelids, trying to clear them. Now, if only she could get him to start sucking his thumb—

"Rangiku? I'm thirsty." He looked at her. She quickly stashed the camera back into her robes.

"Okay, Shiro- I mean Captain!" She corrected herself. She looked out toward the setting sun. "It's about time to end the day, anyway. Let's get you home. You can have water then, okay?" He was still sleepy. She squatted down below the couch, allowing Toshiro's hands to wind around her neck so that she could carry him more easily.

"You…can call me Shiro if you want."

Rangiku was so shocked that she didn't have any coherent thoughts.

"But Captain, you hate being called Shiro, Lil' Shiro, or Shiro-chan!"

Toshiro thought for a moment. "I'll let you call me that. Just don't…tell Momo."

Rangiku blinked.

"Okay…Shiro. Let's go, okay? Oh-wait! We should get you to the Fourth division for your bruise, 'kay?"

"Fourth? No way! Please, Rangiku, it's feeling a lot better! I don't wanna go!" He let go of her, and fell hard onto the carpet.

"Oww…" Tears welled in his eyes.

"Shh, it's okay," Rangiku said. She could tell that he wasn't seriously hurt, just startled combined with his apparent fear of doctors. Now it was damage control time. "I promise no one will hurt you or give you a shot. I just want to make sure that you don't have a fracture in your jaw."

Toshiro stopped. "No shot?"

"No shot. If you're _really_ good, you might get a lollipop!"

With that, they set off toward the Fourth division, ignoring the stares of the shinigami heading towards their barracks. Toshiro got his water there. An exhausted Lieutenant Isane said that there was no fracture, but the bone was bruised. She quickly treated it, and indeed did give Toshiro some candy for his patience. Captain Unohana sat sleeping in a chair the whole time.

Rangiku decided that candy wasn't a suitable dinner, so she ended up cooking a meal for Toshiro as well when they got home. Unfortunately, Rangiku was infamous for having an unusual taste in cooking, and Toshiro refused to eat it. He then turned green, and threw up a concoction of water, stomach acid, and approximately two pounds of candy on the table and all over the "food" Rangiku made.

After undressing him and giving him a bath, which was embarrassing enough for her, she gave him a peanut butter sandwich. Good enough, right? She put him in his bed, and started to leave. The second she closed his bedroom door behind her, though, Toshiro immediately began to cry out for her. To appease him, she crawled in his bed with him, leaving the door cracked so light could stream through. Toshiro threw his arms around her. As she lay there trying not to disturb her captain, she couldn't help but wonder if every other lieutenant had to go through this.

* * *

><p><strong>Day 7(I'm sure glad that Day 1 is over, aren't you?)<strong>

"As expected, Master, many captains have almost completely regressed into children. Toshiro Hitsugaya, in particular, seems to have bonded to his lieutenant, and treats her as a mother. The older captains also seem to be especially afflicted," Nemu Kurotsuchi said. The dark room was illuminated only by the screen, giving her a pale, ghostly look."Hmm…possibly due to his already young age, and that he received a large dosage of the concoction." Mayuri Kurotsuchi said to his 'daughter.' He was particularly interested in Hitsugaya. Mayuri hadn't had a clue how his little potion would affect him. "And the others?"

"Kenpachi Zaraki's subordinates unanimously agreed that they couldn't spar with a child. Sajin Komamura steadfastly refuses to remove his armor. He's been using makeshift armor made out of buckets and the like. He has been seen leading Kaname Tousen around by the hand, the latter of whom has begun to suck his thumb." Mayuri moved toward the screen, which was now showing a video of such acts.

"Probably a habit he had as a child." Mayuri said thoughtfully. One week into the experiment and things were going well. Mayuri was currently holed up in a private room in the Twelfth division, refusing to meet with the angry lieutenants seeking a cure from their hell. Rangiku Matsumoto, in particular, had gone so far as to threaten Mayuri's safety and the contents of the Department of Research and Development. Normally, he would have her arrested, but the Second division decided to turn a blind eye towards any attempts on the Twelfth captain's life.

So what could he do? He was content with a simple retaliation-doing nothing. The longer he drew out the experiment, the longer he would get to enjoy his revenge. Both on the lieutenants and the captains.

Though he may not be able to physically examine his guinea pigs, he made do with what he had- cameras. There was safety in solitude, and Yamamoto probably wouldn't force him to work, for fear of meeting the same fate as his fellow captains. Kurotsuchi was fully prepared to do it, too, if things didn't turn out smoothly and he was stripped of his rank and thrown back into prison. Or worse... be stripped of his _powers _and thrown into the World of the Living.

In truth, he had developed a solution _before_ the experiment began. It was only due to their stupidity that the captains hadn't realized it. How else was he able to make sure that he, Yamamoto and Sasakibe weren't affected? It's a simple step to take to turn a vaccine into a cure.

"…extreme decrease in the flow of paperwork, even though many captains were reported to have returned to work. A probable inability to read or write has afflicted them." Nemu went on. Mayuri bared his teeth, the closest anyone's ever seen him smile.

"Captains Soi Fon and Kuchiki seem to be holding up well against their new hormones." Nemu added.

"They had difficult childhoods. They are instinctually reenacting the lessons they were taught when they were children." Mayuri said smoothly.

"…But wasn't Byakuya Kuchiki supposedly a brat, Master?"

"Then the way they've acted for years is battling with their new instincts!" Mayuri snapped. He didn't give a damn about Kuchiki. Mayuri was okay just getting to see his public humiliation. But Soi Fon…that will be interesting. The Second division captain was renowned for her coldness and ruthlessness. But she had just…one…weakness.

"Nemu! Set up a camera into the Second division office!" He barely heard her acquiescence. He smiled.

He just hoped he would be able to see when she met her.

* * *

><p>Gasp! Guess who?<p>

One note, back in the scene where Ikkaku stumbles upon Sleeping Shiro, I originally wrote it having both Ikkaku and Yumichika in the scene. When I removed Yumichika, I had to edit all the "they"-s and the "two of them"-s and the "us"-s out of it. I may have missed one, so I apologize if you catch an error. Review and inform me of it!

Questions? Comments? Complaints? Forward them to the Review Section, please.


	7. Isane's Desperation

You know, I wish I could have fit something in about the Shinigami Women's Association. But with the captains…out of commission, Rukia in the World of the Living, Yachiru doing…well, you'll see in a couple chapters… Nemu in hiding, and the rest of the lieutenants up to their necks in work, it just wouldn't have fit into the plot.

Anyway, thank you for the reviews. They are inspiring as always. I'm finding less time to write, so I may slow the update speed by a couple days. Luckily, today is a day where I don't have classes, so I can take a break and write a little.

* * *

><p>The Experiment<p>

Chapter Seven: Isane's Desperation

* * *

><p><strong>Day 10<strong>

"Isane!" Unohana cried.

"In a minute, sweetie, I'm coming!" Isane Kotetsu was sweating. Not only was she expected to take on both her and her captain's loads of work, she had also took on the role of Main Healer at the Fourth Division. Isane and her captain had explained the situation shortly after returning from that fateful Captain's Meeting. They had emphasized to the division that they would appreciate support and patience in the coming month. But her division couldn't help much. The recent hollow attacks combined with the normal ruckus that already took place in Soul Society made the Fourth Division merely a place to sleep for many. Many of her subordinates were constantly in and out of other divisions, or on rescue missions to the World or the Living, or had simply passed out from exhaustion in a dark hallway. She was near tears at the thought of all of the work she needed to do, and all she wanted to do was see her sister.

Right now, she was trying to save a shinigami's life. He was one of the only survivors of a patrol gone wrong. He had lost his right leg below his upper thigh. Unohana, who had previously insisted that she supervise the Healing Ward like always, surprisingly became squeamish around blood. She had witnessed a seat-less shinigami use a syringe on a patient, and she had actually turned green and buried her head in Isane's shoulder. It took her forever to calm the child down. This current gruesome sight had apparently pushed Unohana over the edge, too, and she was crying out.

…

One less survivor. Isane felt the reiatsu in the man go out of him. She straightened. Unohana was looking at her with a tearstained face. Even in her childish state, she knew that Isane should still be scrambling to save that man's life, and that something was wrong. Isane took her captain by the hand and gently led her away, so a subordinate could take care of the corpse.

One week and three days had passed since her captain had been changed into a child. Attempts to contact Mayuri Kurotsuchi had failed, and her captain was only getting worse. Isane swept her gray hair from her face. It was time to make a call.

* * *

><p>Ten minutes later, Isane was in her captain's office. She had passed Unohana onto a protesting 7th seat, by the name of Hanataro Yamada. She went to the captain's desk and grabbed a box of black powder. She sat down on the floor and began.<p>

"Black and white net. Twenty-two bridges, sixty-six crowns and belts. Footprints, distant thunder, sharp peak, engulfing land, hidden in the night, sea of clouds, blue line. Form a circle and fly through the heavens. Bakudo 77: Tenteikura!"

As she was conducting the spell, Isane drew symbols on her arms and on the ground with the powder. She concentrated on two people.

"_To Kisuke Urahara and Yoruichi Shihoin, from Lieutenant Isane Kotetsu. Requesting a face-to-face audience immediately. Concerns a matter affecting all of Soul Society."_

She ended the message. If he was interested enough, he'd respond. To be safe, she added the last sentence, on the off chance that Yoruichi Shihoin may infer that it meant Soi Fon, as well.

Who was she kidding? In all the years she knew Urahara, she never knew the former captain of the Department of Research and Development to be _uninterested_ in something. He'd respond.

Though he was a traitor, and an exiled traitor at that, in the eyes of Soul Society, these were times of peril. Her captain's recent personality changes made Isane fearful. As far as she was concerned, Mayuri Kurotsuchi was a traitor as well. And she frankly trusted Urahara more.

She glanced up. From her position on the floor, she could feel a shift in the reiatsu of the room. Before her eyes, a ghostly white blur was slowly taking shape. Within it, she could see the faces of Kisuke and Yoruichi form. But…how? When she said face-to-face, she meant in person! Of course. Tessai. The former Kido Corps Commander Tessai Tsukabishi had probably developed this strange Bakudo.

"Lieutenant Isane Kotetsu. It's been a while." Kisuke smiled slightly.

Isane wasn't in the mood to be cordial. She had a sense of duty, and befriending a traitor was _not_ among them.

"Yes. Obviously, from our silence over the years, we have no wish to contact you. But a…situation has occurred, one in which Mayuri Kurotsuchi is unwilling or unable to help us with."

Isane quickly summarized the situation. Urahara and Yoruichi were silent through the whole thing, their faces expressionless. Yoruichi at last broke the silence.

"By 'most of the captains' does that mean that Soi Fon is…?" As expected, Yoruichi seemed to only care about her former protégé.

"Yes."

Urahara had broken his silence at last. He was doubled up on the floor, howling with laughter. Yoruichi's mouth twitched.

"And what about Byakuya?"

"Him, too. All except for the Head Captain and Kurotsuchi himself." With that, Yoruichi was down as well.

"This is so great! Now I can call him "Bya-kun" again!" she wheezed.

Though the thought of a _childish_ Byakuya Kuchiki _was _humorous, Isane needed to be serious.

"Mayuri Kurotsuchi has refused to come out of the Twelfth division, and his subordinates seem fully prepared to defend their laboratory till their dying breath. It is unknown if he is actually developing a cure or not, as he refuses to send so much as a Hell Butterfly. He spies on the captains from a distance. Though he initially said that it would take a month to develop a solution and he has nothing but time, I feel as if I cannot wait. So I'm turning to you, to beg for your help. I'm concerned for my and all of the other captains' well-beings, not to forget Soul Society's well-being. It may very well collapse without them."

They were still laughing.

"Is…isn't there a child captain? What about him? Little guy probably didn't have many years to spare…" Urahara croaked.

"He's fully accepted his lieutenant as his mother and enjoys eating himself sick with watermelon!" Isane snapped at last. "Will you help me or not?"

At last they became serious. "I for one would be pleased to help Soul Society, as I am but a humble servant of it," Urahara said. "That being said, I _cannot_ help you. I am dealing with more pressing concerns here (A/N: He's dealing with Rukia and Ichigo in the real world. See how sly I am?). And anyway, you've forgotten that we are in hiding."

Isane swallowed. "I am prepared to slip into the material world, give you what you require and take a vow of silence involving your position."

Kisuke stared. "Look, Mayuri is having fun. He's taking a bit of revenge on Soul Society because of his incarceration. Eventually, he'll have to return the captains to normal, and he knows it."

She pressed, "But we can't be sure of that! We don't know what he's thinking, and we _don't_ know what he's capable of! _Please_, can you try to develop a cure?"

Kisuke sighed and appeared to give in. "Can you bring me a sample of your captain's blood? I'll see what I can do." Needles? Oh no. Isane recalled the previous needles fiasco with Unohana. This will be a challenge.

"Can I go and get it, instead of her coming to us? I want to see Soi Fon for myself." Yoruichi spoke suddenly.

"As long as you stay hidden and your reiatsu isn't detected, I don't see a problem." Kisuke said thoughtfully.

Isane never dreamed that she'd be doing something as stupid as this. Knowingly letting a traitor into their midst…but Isane never believed that they were traitors. Oh, she'd swear it under oath that she did, but she had a feeling.

"Don't worry. I have a few tricks up my sleeve. You'll barely know I'm there." Yoruichi gave Isane a cat-like grin.

* * *

><p>Kisuke Urahara sat back. Yoruichi was getting ready to go to Soul Society. She was already in her cat form. He had told her to go through the motions, but not to bother getting Unohana's DNA back to him. Truthfully, without knowing what Mayuri did, it would take months to fix the problem. And he had enough to deal with.<p>

But he needed Isane to believe that he wasn't a traitor. She probably trusted him a little if she would go so far as to plead for his help. It was in Soul Society's best interest if he was involved in the times ahead.

After all, if they were going to win the inevitable war against Aizen, they would need all the help they could get.

* * *

><p>Isane stood. Both she and her captain had felt that something was wrong with Kisuke's trial. She needed to believe that their suspicions were right. Confident that she had done all she could do to help her captain, she decided to go back to work. A fifteen minute break was ten minutes longer than necessary. She returned to the Healing Ward. Two Eleventh Division shinigami were the most serious injuries there. They probably had a brawl and things got out of hand. Their minor injuries were being treated.<p>

She looked around for Hanataro and Unohana. She didn't see them. But why were people running all over the place?

Hanataro came running toward her, looking stressed.

"Lieutenant! I mean- Captain and Acting Lieutenant! I mean, Lieutenant and Acting Capt-"

Isane forced a smile. "Yes, Seventh seat?"

"I've been looking everywhere, and I have a bunch of people looking and-I walked away for one second-God, she was there and then- Lieutenant, I can't find Captain Unohana!"

* * *

><p>I didn't really know how to fit this in, but Isane punished Hanataro by making him be in charge of taking care of prisoners. Hence, how he ended up talking to and befriending Rukia. I also didn't know exactly where Rukia was imprisoned before she was moved to the Repentance Cell and I was too lazy to reread the chapter or watch the specific episode. I was just trying to subtly tie this story into the main Bleach story a little bit. May I have a cookie anyway?<p> 


	8. The Terrible Duo Forms!

Come with me, and you'll be in a world of pure imagination… I don't know what I'm getting at. That song is in my head right now.

Y U NO REVIEW? Ahem. Sorry about that.

CressidaRene- Gasp! A plot hole! I didn't even think of Kisuke taking advantage of the situation and killing Aizen. Thanks for pointing it out. I've considered the problem for the past couple days. Let's just say that Urahara has inhibitions concerning the murder of a helpless child. In other words, just ignore it. :) Have I told you how awesome your reviews are? It's like, a whole other perspective on my writing. Very refreshing. Please keep it up!

Shepard Cousland, this one's for you.

* * *

><p>The Experiment<p>

Chapter 8: The Terrible Duo Forms!

**Day 10**

Isane was running. She'd finished searching the Fourth Division, despite everyone telling her that they'd already combed it for any signs of Captain Unohana. Now she was moving on to the Fifth. Aizen was no help. He was just as bad off as Captain Unohana was. He was struggling against the grip of his lieutenant, who appeared to be trying to lead him toward the bath houses. The poor boy was covered in unidentifiable ick **(A/N Maybe he was doing something he shouldn't have? XD He was doing evil captain stuff.)**. Lieutenant Momo assured him that she had not seen Unohana. Momo at least appeared to have some idea of how dangerous it was for Unohana to be missing, and distractedly promised to keep an eye out for her.

After all, if her captain couldn't even use Kido, how could she defend herself? Isane hoped fervently that Unohana hadn't run off into the Rukongai. She had subordinates running towards the gates to inquire the gatekeepers of any children going through.

Isane slowed down. She was currently heading toward the Sixth. But Isane had only been in that office for fifteen minutes! How far could a child who couldn't shunpo actually go?

She reversed. And ran toward the Third Division** (A/N I realize this is likely not right, but in my mind, the divisions are laid out like a clock. Where the 13****th**** and 2****nd**** divisions are physically closest to the 1****st**** division. That's how Isane knew to go to the 3****rd**** division. Because besides the 5****th**** division, the 3****rd**** is physically closest to the 4****th****. Hope that clears it up.)**, passing several subordinates along the way.

Five minutes later, she arrived breathless. She had also passed a certain pink haired lieutenant who was apparently heading the same way she was. Surprisingly, she was without her captain.

She quickly shunpoed around the division, paying special attention to dark corners where she knew that children were wont to hide in.

She finally stopped outside of Ichimaru's office. She knocked several times, but she heard no reply. Assuming he was out, she prepared to go elsewhere. She knew that even in times like this, you _don't_ go into a captain's office. Especially not someone's as creepy as Gin Ichimaru's.

"Come in…" A voice whispered from within.

Isane opened it tentatively.

Lieutenant Izuru Kira was sitting on couch staring at her. He pressed a finger to his lips.

"Shh…"

On his lap lay a tiny Gin Ichimaru. He had lost his perpetual smile in his sleep.

And beside him was…

"Captain Unohana!" Isane said loudly. Unohana glanced up from the book she was reading and smiled at Isane.

"Shhhh!" Kira said frantically. "She came in, demanded a story, and…"

Isane understood. Kira had been reading a story to the two of them, and Gin had fallen asleep.

She took out her camera. Nanao had informed her a while ago that she should try to take pictures of her captain, so that the SWA could sell them. Unohana was easy to capture in a good photo…A few shots of her in the Healing Ward would be perfect.

_Click._ This particular photo was slightly ruined by the wide-eyed, pale-faced Kira, but the SWA could crop him out later.

Isane took her captain by the hand. Unohana obediently slid off the couch and laid the book where she'd been sitting. Isane thanked Kira with her eyes and left.

Outside she met some of her subordinates, who were out of breath. She ordered them to send Hell Butterflies to those involved in the search, including Hinamori Momo.

And returned her captain to her proper division.

* * *

><p>Yachiru was bored. Ken-chan was no fun now that he was little. All he wanted to do was play in the mud and break things. She'd wandered off a couple hours ago. She didn't know where she was, but maybe she'd get lucky and find Baldy or Snowy to play with! Or better yet, Bya-kun!<p>

Tall-chan ran by her. Then passed by her again with Lady Unohana. They weren't fun, except to get candy from.

Yachiru went on. Eventually she found herself in Smiley's office.

"Izurun! Play with me!" She cried happily. Finally, some fun.

"Shhh!"

Izurun looked panicked. Smiley was on his lap, and he was waking up. Izuru tried not to move, hoping that he'd go back to sleep. It didn't work.

"Who woke me up?" Smiley seemed angry. His head was bent; his mop of silver hair shadowed his eyes. Yachiru ducked behind the couch, giggling.

Smiley looked over.

"Yachiru? Is that you?" Yachiru stepped out. A wide grin broke out on his face.

"Smiley! Come play with me!"

And giggling, the two set out.

* * *

><p>One hour later, Yachiru and Gin were bored. They wanted to play, but they had no idea what to actually do.<p>

"How about this? We glue some coins to the ground and watch people try to pick them up!" Yachiru said.

Gin shook his head and patted Yachiru. "I have so much to teach you. If you want to prank someone, you gotta prank their _mind._ Get it?"

Yachiru nodded.

"Now, listen up. I got an idea."

* * *

><p>Kira was doing paperwork. What else? There was literally no end to it. He'd seriously underestimated how much work that Captain Ichimaru had to do. And that was <em>on top<em> of all of his lieutenant work! Kira was working to the bone as it was. He admitted that he didn't have that great of a rapport with some of his subordinates. He felt awkward even asking them to lead the training while he was Acting Captain. He didn't want to push his own work onto them, fearing that they'd think him incompetent.

At least his captain was gone. Ichimaru had been content for a while just tossing a ball around. Then Unohana had wandered into the Third Division, looking lost and upset. A subordinate took her to Kira for some reason, rather than just returning her to the Fourth. Unohana was upset, and Gin was looking tired. Kira had a stroke of genius and decided to read them a story. Luckily, someone had come in a few days ago with kids' toys and books. The book was simple and predictable, but it quickly Gin to sleep. Unohana decided to read another book quietly to herself. Kira would have taken her home, but he was afraid of what Gin would be like if he was woken up. Luckily Isane had come in and took Unohana away, and Yachiru found Ichimaru minutes later.

Now Kira was back at work, trying to make up for lost time. Twenty or so minutes mattered a lot with the amount of work he had to do. No matter what, he'd have to work late. Plus he had to find his captain and get him to bed.

Another sheet of paperwork done. Kira grabbed another…and then noticed the giggling. It was right outside the door. He heard hushed whispers and then nothing. Kira gingerly began to work again. An officer had written a report of insubordination. All that was required was a signature, thank whatever god was up there.

Yachiru walked in.

"Hi Izurun!" Yachiru chirped happily. Kira was wary.

"Lieutenant Kusajishi, um…where's Captain Ichimaru?"

She pouted dramatically. "Smiley-chan ran off." She said. "Boy, that's a lot of work! Ken-chan never makes me do anything!"

"That's nice, Lieutenant, but I really have to keep doing it-" Kira began carefully.

"Why don't you make other people do your work for you?" Yachiru asked innocently. "That's what Ken-chan and I do!"

"Because it's my job. Come to think of it, why aren't you with Captain Zaraki?" Kira asked distractedly.

She ignored him. "Maybe…you didn't ask them? Why not, Izurun?"

"Well, because…" Kira blustered. "I…"

"Are you afraid they won't do it even if you ask?" She went on. "They must not respect you if you can't get them to do work. Ken-chan says only the strong get respect. Well, bye then, Izurun!" She quickly skipped out, slamming the door behind her.

"Bye…" He said to the closed door.

That wasn't true, was it? Sure, he may not be the most confident guy in the world, but Captain Ichimaru wouldn't have taken him on as a lieutenant if he thought Kira was weak. Right? Kira tried to block out Yachiru's words.

Weak...

They just wouldn't go away.

Kira at last thrust his chair away from the desk, sick at the sight of the paperwork. One glance back at all the work _he_ was expected to do all by himself drove him to snatch the lieutenant's portion of the paperwork up and angrily open the door. He stormed down the hallway, oblivious to the snickering children hiding behind the potted plant. He found his Fourth seat, and shoved the paperwork into her face, snarling, "Do it. Finish by three o'clock. Start _now._"

"Y-yes Lieutenant!"

With that, Kira slammed the door to his office behind him and returned to work.

Ichimaru and Yachiru stood up and high-fived each other.

"Operation: Inferiority Complex complete. Success." Yachiru whispered.

"Not done yet. Let's see who else we can do this on, Yachiru." Ichimaru whispered back.

* * *

><p>"Why are you the only lieutenant, <em>ever <em>to be given a _trial period_?" Yachiru asked Renji Abarai before dashing off, leaving a dumbstruck pineapple behind him.

It didn't take long for Renji, either. After storming up to his new captain and demanding the same question, the look on Byakuya Kuchiki's face was enough to send Renji into an incoherent, apologizing mess. Success.

* * *

><p>"Why does the Shinigami Women's Association get more money than the Men's?" Ichimaru asked Lieutenant Iba.<p>

Ten minutes later, the children watched as Iba broke into the 8th division and started yelling at his fellow lieutenant. Said lieutenant, Nanao Ise, simply removed her glasses.

The children, as well as Iba, got a full view of this and it sent all three of them scurrying. A…success?

* * *

><p>"Why does Captain Ukitake like Sentaro more than you?" Ichimaru asked Kiyone. In a different room, Yachiru was simultaneously asking Sentaro why Ukitake liked Kiyone more.<p>

This one was too easy. Total success.

* * *

><p>End of chapter.<p>

Their definition of success is that they win if they can manipulate their victims into rage-fueled messes without even realizing who was behind it all.

Since the middle part is in Yachiru's perspective, I tried to keep her thinking childish. She thinks of people by their nicknames. Smiley is obviously Gin, because she was speaking to him. Some that aren't expressly stated, but should still be obvious are:

Ken-chan: Kenpachi Zaraki

Baldy: Ikkaku Madarame

Snowy: Toshiro Hitsugaya

Bya-kun: Byakuya Kuchiki

Tall-chan: Isane Kotetsu

Izurun: Izuru Kira

Oh, and I got the list from the Bleach Wiki. Yachiru once referred to Unohana as "Lady Unohana" in the English dub of the anime (I was recently rewatching it). So I just stuck that in there rather than making up my own nickname or calling her Re-chan like Yachiru does in the Japanese version. I made up Isane's and Gin's nicknames. Is it obvious? xD

I find myself using a combination of names from the English and Japanese versions. Shiro-chan, Bya-kun. "Lady Yoruichi" in the next chapter (Hint, hint). I started out watching the English Dub, then later switched to the subbed version, so that's why, I guess. It makes sense to me, but maybe not to others.


	9. The Plight of Soi Fon

This one's a day late I think. I didn't have time to write until late last night, really. And I wanted to see if I could squeeze one more review out of you guys so I could have a nice even 50. But nooo…Just one more review is too much. "Sorry, we're just going to make you stare at that '49' for a couple days. Because we unanimously decided to let you go crazy. It's just one huge conspiracy." In all seriousness, your reviews are very encouraging as always.

It was also late because I was also toying with the idea of adding an omake-esque segment at the bottom of this chapter, of a Gin-Yachiru prank. I decided to, just for fun because I thought it was a great idea and I couldn't figure out where to put it. The fact that the chapter would be a bit too short without it means nothing. Nothing at all. Thanks to all of you who enjoyed the psychological torment of the last chapter! That was only the beginning…which isn't to say that I'm going to develop it every chapter, because I think it'd get old. You'll see Kira again after maybe three or four more chapters.

I've finally figured out how this will end. Don't worry; I have at least 10k more words to publish. I'm worried that the ending is a little weak, but it might get better. Anyway, aren't you excited to see how it'll all work out? The suspense is killing me…I hope it'll last. xD

* * *

><p>The Experiment<p>

Chapter 9: The Plight of Soi Fon

* * *

><p><strong>Day 14<strong>

"I'll be back in a week or so! See you, Kisuke!" Yoruichi called before passing through the Senkaimon. She was using her cat form, and wearing a collar that would prevent her reiatsu from being detected. Kurotsuchi's monitors might notice it, but she doubted he'd do anything.

The Senkaimon was designed so that it'd open up in the outskirts of Soul Society, in the West Rukon district. From there, she'd make her way into the Department of Research and Development, to see what was really going on. After that, a quick stop at the Fourth Division to check on Captain Unohana. Then, she'd go see Soi Fon. Byakuya, too, if she was lucky. Yoruichi couldn't wait.

* * *

><p>Byakuya sat up. He'd been taking a nap at the manor when he had a dream. A dream about <em>her.<em> He collapsed back into bed.

* * *

><p>Soi Fon wasn't in a good mood. Not terribly shocking. She'd lost her abilities, her respect, and her ability <em>to form coherent sentences<em> in one brief moment. That was two weeks ago.

As soon as she'd left that captain's meeting, she had headed back to her own division. But she didn't arrive. She'd gotten struck with realization, then inspiration, and she reversed direction and headed toward the Eleventh. Lieutenant Yachiru Kusajishi was gone from her room. Soi Fon broke in, an easy enough task when she had no reiatsu to mask. She'd stolen a shihakusho. It turned out that it was too big for her, but at least she wasn't tripping over her clothes anymore. She abandoned her old clothes, tucked her haori under her arm, and returned into her own division. Must look presentable for the masses.

She couldn't wear her braids anymore. With her physical changes, her hair length had changed as well. It was shorter and thinner and softer. She'd been completely reverted to how she was when she was a little girl. Her face was rounder and more cherubic. She'd walked into her division the same as always, though. The expression on her face, at least, was recognizable. It belonged to someone who was to be obeyed.

Soi Fon didn't need or want any help. Yes, she may not be able to physically train her subordinates, but she still had the mental capacity to boss them around.

The very next day, though, things began to change.

She started forgetting things. It began with forgetting her zanpakuto's name, sure. That was day one. She ran into the reading/writing problem early on. She forgot how to send a Hell Butterfly. Hakuda, Kido, as days went on she couldn't remember how to use them. Once, she got lost on her way to bed one night. A subordinate had to lead her to her room. She still had her memories and experiences, but she couldn't really recall them unless she concentrated. Worse still, running the Second Division often wasn't important to her.

She'd heard that the others had given in. She at least, was still clinging, but not for long.

More and more, she was losing her mind.

Soi Fon would never admit it aloud, but she was scared. She gave all of her paperwork to Omaeda and shut herself up in her office. She was afraid that one little occurrence would trigger a total relapse into a three-year-old, and the less involved she was with others, it would be less likely to occur. She needed to hang on until Kurotsuchi developed the cure. Two weeks to go.

In the meanwhile, she tried to relax. It was difficult to do with nothing to distract her. Anything that could entertain her was beyond her ability to fully comprehend, but she was still too mature to be amused by children's toys and books.

She sighed. There really was nothing to do. She'd have to get one of her seated officers in here to give her status reports. That would help.

She climbed off her desk and walked toward the door. She climbed the stool next to it and opened the door to leave.

In sauntered a cat.

It was completely black and had bright yellow eyes. Eyes that reminded her of…someone. She couldn't recall who just now. She stood frozen, her hand on the door, eyes fixed on the cat.

Something was wrong…Soi Fon felt lightheaded. There was something terribly familiar about the animal before her. Then, all at once, she noticed that she was no longer in control of herself. She'd been thrust into her inner world. Her zanpakuto's spirit was nowhere to be seen. Soi Fon could only watch helplessly as her body did what her mind previously prevented.

It toddled toward the cat. Lunging, it tackled it and carried the protesting animal back inside. Soi Fon's hand stroked the cat against the fur, as she mumbled "Kitty!"

Soi Fon beat against the edges of her mind, but she was now only an observer. One look at that strange cat had done it. That cat was the catalyst that caused the child side of her to win. It was in charge now.

Soi Fon, and the rational part of her, was feeling tired. She fought to stay awake, instinctively knowing that if she fell asleep, she might not wake up again. Eventually, she collapsed into darkness. Unbeknownst to her, her child self stayed awake, continuing to play with the reluctant cat.

Child-Soi Fon was in control now. And she wanted to have _fun._

* * *

><p>Yoruichi had intended for a quick visit, to see how Soi Fon was, before going off to see Byakuya. But Soi Fon hadn't left her much of a choice. Soi Fon spent the rest of the afternoon chasing Yoruichi around the office. Yoruichi normally would have let herself be petted, but three year olds didn't know how to treat cats. And Yoruichi couldn't leave, because she couldn't transform to open the door.<p>

Eventually, Soi Fon got bored of Yoruichi. She opened her small mouth in a yawn. She climbed up the stool next to the door and opened it. She left the office, Yoruichi coming out from under the desk to observe her. Soi Fon looked around. It was past sundown. The hallways surrounding the office were deserted. The 2nd division shinigami had gone back to the barracks.

Soi Fon whimpered and began to cry. Yoruichi supposed that she didn't know where she was, or what she was supposed to do. There was no one but Yoruichi to help her.

Yoruichi mentally sighed. Byakuya would have to wait.

Yoruichi walked over to Soi Fon, and stood in front of her to attract Soi Fon's attention. She walked a few paces away and turned. Soi Fon had taken small steps to pursue her. Luring the child, Yoruichi slowly guided her home. Once there, Soi Fon climbed up into her bed. She was already half asleep. Yoruichi sat down beside her. Soi Fon's small hand clutched at Yoruichi's fur. Just as Soi Fon was about to drift off, Yoruichi heard her say, "Lady Yoruichi."

Yoruichi's heart glowed. After all these years, after the pain that she must have put Soi Fon through, some dim part of Soi Fon must still care for her, must still feel and recognize the pull of Yoruichi's soul to hers. Yoruichi stayed where she was for several hours.

Then she got up. Making sure that her reiatsu was still in check, she shifted back to herself. And got to work.

After an hour or so, Yoruichi was done. She shifted back into her cat self…only to shift back into her human self when she realized that Soi Fon had had a little 'accident' in her sleep. Careful not to wake the child, she cleaned Soi Fon as best as she could and changed her clothes and put the soiled ones in the laundry for a subordinate to clean. She got fresh sheets from the wardrobe. Yoruichi laid Soi Fon back into bed. The poor thing didn't stir through the whole thing. Though she may not remember Yoruichi just now, she was still familiar with Yoruichi's reiatsu and completely trusting of it.

When she awoke, Soi Fon would find breakfast, lunch, and dinner cooked and in storage. Yoruichi even managed to get a couple toys for her. Yoruichi supposed that she'd have to find a rubber mattress tomorrow.

Yoruichi was glad to help though. Though Soi Fon may not even remember it when she turned back, Yoruichi was trying to atone for the heartache she must have caused Soi Fon. She wanted her little bee to forgive her.

* * *

><p>"Hey, Yumi- whoa. What happened to <em>you<em>?" Hisagi's eyes grew wide. Yumichika instinctively reached for his face.

"What, is there something on my face?" Yumichika had checked his reflection before he'd left this morning, but he couldn't find his mirror that he carried around everywhere. Blast. He'd been walking around with some _blemish_ all morning.

"No, no, it's just…wow, this whole month has done a number on you, huh? You're looking a lot…older." Hisagi said slowly. Yumichika shrieked and ran toward the Eleventh Division, clutching his face.

Hisagi stared after him. "Yeah, nothing on your face except moronic feathers…" he mumbled. He raised his voice. "How was that?"

Yachiru and Gin stepped out. "Perfect. Thank you!" Gin said sweetly. Yachiru handed over the promised money. The two cackled and ran off in Yumichika's wake.

Hisagi didn't mind messing around with Yumichika. Especially if he got paid to do it. He allowed himself a small smile. He pocketed the small change and went off toward the Ninth Division training grounds.

* * *

><p>College Algebra<p>

Ugh, I have so much to do

And so little time.

:)

I hope you enjoyed

Please don't forget to review

It makes me happy.

(:

I am on a roll

I think I deserve applause

Haiku is so fun.


	10. Adventures In Babysitting

You want to favorite this story. You want to review this story. You love this story. It is the air you breathe, the food you eat.

Sigh. It didn't work? Well, it was too obvious. Maybe I should put subliminal messages in my chapters.

Azelf1717: Thanks for your review! It's always nice to hear from new readers!

To The Awesome God Apollo,

"A fellow poet

You're a worthy opponent

Although I won't lose."

Hehe, anyway. To answer your review: Toshiro has had less of a role than anticipated. If it makes you feel better, Toshiro is a supporting character in this chapter. Oh, and congrats on being review number 50. And CressidaRene for being 55.

Now, on to the story!

* * *

><p>The Experiment<p>

Chapter 10: Adventures in Babysitting

* * *

><p><strong>Day 21<strong>

Lieutenant Nanao Ise didn't tolerate nonsense, even if it came from her captain.

The very first thing she did upon taking her captain back to the Eighth Division was take a large bag and search the division for any bit of sake that Kyoraku had hidden and didn't think she knew about. Kyoraku had protested of course, doing his "But, Nanao-chan…" routine. She admitted to herself that it was more convincing now that he was a cute kid. But she would _not_ allow a child to drink alcohol.

Kyoraku fought with her at first, of course. But over the days when he became more childish, he actually became more compliant. He was genuinely afraid of her, and she didn't even have to take off her glasses to make him sit down and shut up.

Nanao was shocked at the amount of paperwork that Kyoraku did. Normally, she had to force her captain to sign a document. He must have been doing it while she wasn't looking. Still, a compliant Kyoraku makes for a very happy Nanao. Without having to stress over him, she could get more work done. She was actually _ahead_ on paperwork. She was happy, for the first two weeks.

Then the other Lieutenants got wind of her. That she was actually thriving in these times…

Rangiku Matsumoto came to her first. She wasn't her usual carefree self. Her hair was messy and she looked like she hadn't slept in years. She apparently wasn't exhausted enough to whine and plead and beg Nanao to take care of Captain Hitsugaya for her. She was even willing to pay. It turned out that when she said "pay" she meant "go drinking with Nanao," but Nanao didn't know that then. She took a giggling Toshiro Hitsugaya and plopped him next to Shunsui Kyoraku, barking at them to "play."

And got back to work. Hitsugaya was pretty upset at first, having really bonded with Rangiku over the past few days. Kyoraku was fairly nice to him, and neither of them caused any trouble for her.

The next day, Thirteenth Division Third seats Kiyone Kotetsu and Sentaro Kotsubaki dropped off Captain Jushiro Ukitake as well, promising to pay her in paperwork. Before Nanao knew it, she had become a daycare. _She_ got sniffling children, and got paid in favors, IOUs, and empty promises to do her paperwork for her. What a payoff.

The other lieutenants had spared her from dumping all of the children off on her all at once. She usually took care of the same captains every day. Captain Soi Fon was apparently doing fine by herself. Captains Tosen and Komamura were also no trouble to their lieutenants, so Nanao hadn't seen them yet. Captain Ichimaru was up to his hijinks with Lieutenant Kusajishi, who had abandoned Kenpachi Zaraki to his own devices. Kenpachi Zaraki was a frequent flyer here. He was mostly content to play with action figures, though. Nanao also took care of Byakuya Kuchiki, Toshiro Hitsugaya, Jushiro Ukitake, and Retsu Unohana. Plus her own captain, of course.

Jushiro Ukitake wasn't a problem. He and Captain Kyoraku were best friends, so Ukitake came around often. The two often played together with Unohana and Hitsugaya. The only problems were…

She was jolted out of her reverie when Kenpachi Zaraki and Byakuya Kuchiki, who were in Nanao's daycare today, broke out into a fight. Unohana was already trying to break it up.

Nanao got up from the desk and approached the boys. That was enough to separate them. Nanao stood in silence, until Byakuya Kuchiki squeaked out "S-sorry Miss Nanao…"

She looked to Kenpachi Zaraki, who got the message and muttered, "Sorry…" looking anywhere but at her face.

Nanao was tired of this. The days that Kenpachi Zaraki and Byakuya Kuchiki were here were the days that she could count on at least one fight breaking out. They really hated each other, unsurprisingly. They did this all the time and expected her to forgive them.

Not today. Nanao had actually developed a sort of pleasure when she got to exercise her creative mind to come up with punishments for the boys. It concerned her a little bit.

Right now, though, she was completely tapped out. In desperation, she yelled at them, "You two are going to pick each other's punishments! _Now._"

Realization came over their faces. Byakuya Kuchiki started, "But that's not fair! We were-"

"No. What isn't fair is that I have to take care of you out of my own goodwill, while your lieutenants get to relax. What isn't fair is that I have to run an entire division, but I can't trust anyone else to keep a good eye on you two. What isn't fair is that if I look away for more than a minute, you two are at each other's throats again. You are going to choose each other's punishments. If you don't, I'll punish you more." Nanao said. Nanao was even scaring herself. She was too tired to stop though.

The boys looked at each other. Byakuya Kuchiki ended up choosing a timeout for Kenpachi Zaraki. Zaraki chose for Kuchiki to do pushups. Then they started squabbling to each other about the unfairness of each other's punishments. Huh. An unexpected upside. They weren't resentful toward Nanao anymore.

She sat back down at her desk. Three minutes in time out and ten pushups later, the two kids didn't have any will to fight. She got back to work, trying to ignore the throbbing in her left temple. That headache. That damned headache. Every single day. The same spot, the same ache, and nothing could take it away. She hated this.

Lunchtime wasn't so bad. Nanao ordered an underling to bring food every day. The worst part of it all was bathroom breaks. Nanao couldn't leave the office to escort the one kid who needed to go, because the rest of them would be unsupervised. So she took everyone to bathroom breaks all at once. It turned out to be a pretty good idea, because it taught the children exactly _who_ was in charge.

She had to bind the children to each other and to herself with Kido so they couldn't run off. She let them go by themselves into the boy's room so they could go. It had only one door, and no windows, so there was no chance of escape.

Then she had to bind the boys to some poor shinigami while she and Unohana went inside the girls' bathroom. Several times, she'd had to run out because she heard screaming, and she'd find the shinigami being dragged away by the boys, who were trying to make a run for it.

Then Nanao would take all of them back to the office, picking up a stranded Unohana along the way. She was the only one that Nanao could count on to be _good_. Nanao was actually okay with taking care of her, because she knew that Isane, of the underestimated Fourth Division, was probably struggling more than she was. Unohana still had a lot of maturity, and she could control the boys almost as well as Nanao could.

"Miss Nanao?"

Captain Hitsugaya came up to her, sniffling. He was clutching a stuffed bear in his arms. "Miss Nanao, where's Granny?"

"Granny? Who? Do you mean Rangiku?" Nanao said wildly.

Hitsugaya giggled. "No, I mean Granny! And where's Momo?"

Oh. She'd heard that he and Hinamori Momo grew up together. Maybe Granny is the woman who took care of them.

Obviously, Nanao couldn't take him to go see his Granny. She just hoped that he wouldn't make a big deal about it. God, if he did, Unohana would probably start crying too. The rest of the boys would probably take the opportunity to act up, too. Nanao was overwhelmed. She simply couldn't take care of the kids anymore and do her job.

An idea struck her. One that could benefit her greatly. At the very least, it'd take some of her headache away.

She hugged Hitsugaya. "Sorry, Captain. I can't take you to see Granny. But I _can_ take you to see Momo."

His face lit up. She announced to the kids that they'd be going on a spontaneous field trip to the Fifth Division.

And so they went. The Kido that she had on the kids made it so that the kids couldn't go more than ten feet away from Nanao. Unohana and Hitsugaya each claimed one of Nanao's hands. Kyoraku and Ukitake ran along beside them. Kuchiki and Zaraki trailed sullenly along behind, occasionally shoving each other. They arrived at the Fifth, and Hitsugaya jumped into a surprised Momo's arms, causing said lieutenant to drop the paperwork she was holding.

"Momo-chan!" He said happily. The other children greeted Sosuke Aizen, who was picking up the fallen papers.

"Hi, Shiro-chan! Lieutenant Ise, you look…busy." Momo said.

"Hinamori. I'm recruiting you for babysitting." Nanao said wearily.

"What? No! I can't! I'm busy!"

"So am I. Don't you want Aizen to play with other kids? You can get work done at the Eighth. I just need more people to take care of the kids. I can't do it all by myself." Nanao said. She really wasn't up for chitchat. She threw all of her points in in one statement.

"Look, I understand, but I'm-"

Nanao cut off her excuses. "Momo. Go ahead and say no, but you're going to help me. I'll leave Captain Hitsugaya behind so that _you_ can take care of him."

That seemed to convince her. That Nanao was dangerously close to insanity, maybe. More than anything, she obviously didn't want to take care of two captains on her own. With Momo recruited, they returned to the Eighth Division.

* * *

><p>Not very happy chapter, is it? Sorry. I'm kind of scared of how quickly I made Nanao fall into the role of supreme dictator. I'm sure Freud would have something to say about this. I think I was channeling my mom. She didn't believe in corporal punishment. But she was a very scary woman in a different way.<p>

Anyway, I'd appreciate reviews, like always. And I don't mind criticisms. As my favorite author, Anthony Burgess once wrote in a prologue to my favorite novel, A Clockwork Orange, "Eat this sweetish segment or spit it out. You are free."


	11. A Matter of Trust

Happy Valentine's Day! I made a Valentine's Day card for my twin brother, who lives a couple states away from me. It reads, "Choose me or your pyre...Be Mine or you will BURN!" And if you don't understand, you missed out on life and should really rewatch The Hunchback of Notre Dame. Specifically the song, "Hellfire." Classic Disney films: A guilty pleasure.

The Awesome God Apollo:

"I admit you're good.

That took a lot of effort.

Sigh. I think you win."

I concede because unless I write a whole chapter in haiku, I can't top your review. Congrats. This guy/girl? wrote a whole review as a string of haiku. You should read it.

I have this little pocket puzzle where you have to get several interlocking rings apart. It's a little difficult to describe, but I carry it around in my purse and try to solve it while I'm just waiting around. I finally solved it! But now I just can't figure out how to put it back together. Damn it.

Oh, and forgive the titles. This chapter doesn't have a singular theme. I love Billy Joel and Stephen King, so I took titles off of their respective works. Anyway, enjoy.

* * *

><p>The Experiment<p>

Chapter 11: A Matter of Trust/Children of the Corn

* * *

><p><strong>Day 20(Yes, I went back in time)<strong>

Soi Fon had stopped going to work for the past week now that she had "Kitty" to spend time with her. She didn't seem to recognize Yoruichi's cat form; to her, she was just a playmate. Yoruichi didn't dare be human around her. Soi Fon would recognize her then. She would probably be angry, and then she'd know not to trust Kitty. So Yoruichi had spent the past few days doing her best to entertain Soi Fon as a cat by day, and take care of Soi Fon's basic needs by night. Soi Fon didn't seem to care who prepared her food, or laid out her clothes for her every day. If she did, she didn't question it.

Yoruichi was happy. Because her little bee was happy. It was lucky that Soi Fon had a camera lying around. Endless snapshots of Soi Fon sleeping, stuffed animals clutched to her chest populated the memory on it. She'd even left it lying around so that Soi Fon would find it and take clumsy pictures of herself and Kitty. She'd eventually have to make copies for herself, and then delete almost everything off of it so Soi Fon wouldn't know who had been taking care of her. Still, everything was going great.

A couple Second Division shinigami came around the first few days. After finding Soi Fon happy and in good health (with Yoruichi hiding), they would leave, probably praising whatever god for their good fortune and chalking it all up to some Fourth divisioner taking matters into their own hands.

But now Soi Fon was sick. Yoruichi could tell that she had a fever, but from what was beyond her basic healing skills. So last night, Yoruichi had crept through the Seiretei to find Isane, the only person she could trust here. Well… there was Kukaku Shiba, but she was in Rukongai and she didn't have healing experience. It was strep throat, Isane had decided. She gave Yoruichi some antibiotics for Soi Fon.

The infection was a human one. Yoruichi had probably carried it with her when she came from the World of the Living. Yoruichi had already had it, so she was just a carrier. It made sense that Soi Fon would be infected.

The antibiotics would help clear the disease in a matter of days. In the meanwhile, Soi Fon was so delirious with fever that she couldn't get out of bed. So Yoruichi had to take care of her. She could have found a way to get a Second Division shinigami to do it. She was very afraid, though, of being seen, or worse, _recognized._ Though it'd been over a century since she left, there were still a few who might remember her.

She wasn't worried about Soi Fon seeing her anymore. Her fever was probably making everything one big blur. At worst, she'd probably just remember Yoruichi as being a part of a dream. So Yoruichi spent most of her time as a human. She bathed Soi Fon and changed her sheets twice a day. Mostly, the girl slept, but when she was awake she smiled at Yoruichi. Yoruichi fed her broth and read her books. She didn't tell Soi Fon anything of substance until the last night before Soi Fon's fever broke.

In the dim lamplight, Yoruichi looked worn and grave. Soi Fon slept restlessly. Yoruichi reached a hand out to Soi Fon's hair.

"Little bee, I don't know if your normal self is awake in there…" Yoruichi began, but hesitated for a moment. "But I need to tell you a few things that I hope that you will remember…"

"Maybe you know this, but I didn't leave because I was a traitor. There was this…situation involving Kisuke and Aizen, and…" Yoruichi didn't want to get into it.

"I suppose I did choose Kisuke over you," Yoruichi said, smiling sadly. She remembered how much Soi Fon had _hated_ Kisuke, and how much Yoruichi had teased her for it. "But that doesn't matter. Kisuke and Tessai…and all of the others… in one moment, I chose to help them. Lives depended on me. But I didn't know who I would _hurt._ You, the girl who was my student, and my friend. The girl I'd promised to look out for if she'd do the same for me. I'm so sorry."

"I'm sorry for every ounce of pain I've caused you."

"As long as I've known you, I've always trusted you. There was something about you that told me that you'd follow me anywhere. I… let you into my life, taught you and let you rely on me, and then left you without a thought. I'd never imagined that you would close your heart off to everyone else. It was only natural, I suppose, but I guess I just wanted to believe that you'd be all right. I wanted to believe so hard, that I thought it to be true. I don't know if or when we may speak as equals, but I want…need you to know that I…"

"I never, _ever_, meant for it to turn out like this."

A tear ran down Yoruichi's face as she sat back. Soi Fon slept peacefully now. Yoruichi reached out a hand to Soi Fon's cheek. Good, the fever had broken. It was time for Yoruichi to return to her cat form.

But not yet. Standing, she leaned over Soi Fon's tiny form and brushed her hair out of her face. She whispered,

"I'll always love you, Soi Fon. Whether you ever return the favor or not, try to at least believe this: Trust Sosuke Aizen and you'll regret it with your life."

* * *

><p><strong>Day 17(And even further back...)<strong>

Isane didn't want to get up. It was dawn. She knew she _had_ to get up, but she couldn't find the strength just now. She'd have to actually do her job, something she previously enjoyed but now couldn't because Unohana wasn't around to do her own job.

That's right. Unohana. Isane finally found a reason to face the day. It was breakfast time for her captain.

Isane rolled out of bed. Standing, she stretched her aching muscles. She walked over to her wardrobe. She selected a normal shihakusho and began to dress in her usual uniform. She frowned.

Her shirt sleeves were several inches too short.

Did one of her subordinates mess up her laundry and shrink her clothes? She disrobed and grabbed another shihakusho, one that she didn't include in her latest wash.

This one was small, too. What was going on? She couldn't have…

She screamed. How is this possible? That she could grow overnight? Or had it happened so slowly that she hadn't realized it because she was so preoccupied and oh my God oh my God…

Isane realized that her mind was rambling and wasn't making sense. She was vaguely aware that she was hyperventilating.

There was pounding on the door. "Lieutenant! Lieutenant!"

Isane couldn't think about this right now. So she collected herself.

"I'm fine!" She called through the door. Silence on the other end. They were probably waiting for her to come out. She didn't hear any retreating footsteps. She finished dressing with fumbling fingers.

She jammed her shoes on her feet. They, at least, were the same size…

Isane stifled a sob. She stood from her seat on her bed and quickly moved through to the door.

As her hand touched the door, she paused. She'd heard something.

She turned around and faced the window. There was nothing there. Frowning, she moved toward the window to look outside. There was a sudden rustling.

She quickly threw open the windows. Nothing there. Wait…she could have sworn she saw a flash of pink. Yachiru? Could she have done this?

Kira had come to her yesterday, asking for something to help his anxiety. He mentioned that Gin Ichimaru and Yachiru had been up to something.

Isane suppressed the urge to swear. Those brats…

* * *

><p><strong>Day 18(Next update it'll be back to Day 21. Promise.)<strong>

"Soon."

It was the only word that was written on an anonymous note. It had been delivered to the Fifth Division in the early morning, but it'd gotten buried under incoming paperwork and she hadn't been able to read it until late morning. Momo looked for any identifying traits about the note's writer. None. The letters themselves were just cutouts of the typed print of the Seireitei Communication. Captain Aizen didn't know anything, either.

She'd asked other people about it at lunch, when she and the captain had gone to the cafeteria to get something to eat. No one knew anything, until she'd spoken to Renji Abarai, who was stopping by on his way to carry a message to the Fourth division.

"Yeah…" he scratched his head. "Soon, right?"

"Yes! So what do you think it means?"

"I don't know. I don't really care. Probably just someone trying to pull a stupid joke."

Then he'd left.

As Captain Aizen scarfed his food down like a typical boy, Momo pondered the note. It was then that Izuru Kira came in, spotted her, and made a beeline toward her. His eyes were wide, and he looked like he was trembling.

"I-I just, I got this message, and Renji said you knew something, and I'm really scared. Please-please tell me you know what's going on!" In reply, Momo handed him her own note.

"Soon."

Kira squeaked and twitched. He paled even further.

"Oh, God, it's them." Kira buried his face in his hands and sat down.

Momo patted him on the shoulder. "It's who?"

"M-my captain and Yachiru. They…they…" Kira seemed close to tears. He told her what they had put him through. Something called "Blood Tea", which Kira refused to explain. His robes he wore under his shihakusho had been dyed pink. He'd also been coated in honey and feathers… Not to mention that was being "stalked" by weird creaking noises.

Kira was shaking. "Once, I was walking out of the office, and Yachiru was standing right beside me and started screaming her head off!" Was he joking? Was that really the worst thing that they'd ever done? No, he was just hysterical.

Momo had to do something. Kira was close to snapping.

Kira twitched away, probably going back to work. She dropped Aizen off at the Eighth division, promising to be back in a few minutes. From there, she headed to the Third division. Intending to go to the office, she stopped suddenly when she heard some loud giggling.

She found Yachiru and Captain Ichimaru behind a nearby potted plant.

"Okay, you two. What are you going to do to Kira?" Momo said, frowning. She was actually shocked that Kira's paranoia was correct. It made sense, though. Now that she thought about it, it was weird that they hadn't teamed up _sooner._

They straightened up.

"Nothing, actually." Gin whispered. "He knows that we're out here. We're just making some noise so that he'll freak out."

Momo crouched down with them. She subconciously lowered her voice so that she was whispering too. She pulled the note she'd received out of her shihakusho. "But…what about this? Soon? What does that mean?"

Yachiru giggled. "Nothing! We're just having some fun, and we thought it'd be fun to give other people notes too!"

Gin nodded knowingly. "The best prank isn't a prank at all. It's fear."

Momo understood. By giving her and Renji notes, too, it made the threats more likely and Kira would be more afraid of his impending doom. In reality, the notes were meaningless. The prank was just paranoia. She shook her head and stood. "Sorry, but I have to tell Kira."

Gin stepped forward, smiling. "If you do, we'll stop messing with Kira. And start with you."

Momo's blood turned cold. She was legitimately afraid of this child.

"But Kira…"

"In the long run, it will help him. Now, you didn't see anything, did you?" Gin said.

Momo weighed her options. Help Kira, and she'd face the evil children's wrath. Don't help Kira, he'll end up in a more twitchy mess, but might actually turn out for the better. Momo started to walk away. Then stopped.

"Wait. One thing. Kira said that he kept hearing phantom noises. What were they?"

Gin's grin grew wider. "Partially his imagination, but we also planted devices in the ceilings that play creaking noises and howling."**(A/N I actually have a device that does this. It's called the "EvilTron.")**

Momo now fully understood Kira's fear. These children were insane. She fled. Behind her she heard the cackles of the two children.

* * *

><p>I didn't write the Yoru-Soi scene intending to pair them. But if it seems that way to you, go ahead and think it.<p>

I also didn't intend for this chapter to be half full of nonsense. I was going to include the first part with Chapter 10 to give you guys a mega-chapter of like 3k words vs the normal 2k. But again, there were some pranks that I just didn't want to leave out. The Isane thing was pretty clever in my opinion. And yes, I _am_ patting myself on the back.

Oh, and I was considering writing scenes detailing what exactly Gin and Yachiru did to Kira. I ultimately decided to leave it up to your imaginations. The next chapter will have more Kira humor and…the beginning of the end. Well, it's a really, really subtle beginning of the end, but whatever.


	12. Naughty or Nice

Pokeking95: Thank you for the review! I'm glad to hear that my writing is acceptable! I sometimes write too...pompously, I guess. My grammar and punctuation are sometimes off (I stopped really caring about it the day I graduated), but I pride myself on at least not sounding illiterate.

Admittedly, the chapters are too short for me too. My writing process is like this: I just get random spurts of inspiration sometimes. They can be ideas, or cool little phrases. I write them down or put them in my phone, and then I build around them. So when the inspiration doesn't come...well, you end up with short chapters. I'd want longer chapters from me if I was in your shoes, too, but this is the best I'm really capable of. To compensate, I release chapters faster. I don't consider myself a professional writer at all. Fiction, especially, doesn't come easy to me. I'm glad to hear that you like it, though.

As for the ending... I think it might be a little "stagnant", as you put it. I'm still working on it bit by bit, so we'll see. I promise it'll have more humor and cuteness. I'm glad that I at least thought up an ending at all! It would have been so disappointing to me and everyone who reads my story if I just abandoned it. At least, I hope it'd be disappointing to you guys. Maybe I'm overestimating my story's worth.

To conclude this overly long reply, I really appreciate your review. It's nice to hear creative compliments and even criticism. Please keep reading!

* * *

><p>The Experiment<p>

Chapter 12: Naughty or Nice

* * *

><p><strong>Day 21<strong>

Momo was sitting in the Eighth Division's offices, playing "Go Fish!" with some of the kids. She looked around.

Byakuya Kuchiki and Sosuke Aizen were actually doing well. No help needed. It wasn't surprising, considering that they were two of the most intelligent captains. Not that the other captains weren't intelligent, but…

She glanced at Kenpachi Zaraki. He wasn't playing. He was playing, until Momo dared to reprimand him for looking at Captain Ukitake's cards. He then scattered his cards and the others in the piles in front of him, which meant the game had to be reset. He was sitting sullenly by himself. Momo decided to let him sulk for a couple more minutes.

Captain Unohana was playing too. She seemed to be having a little bit of trouble, but Shiro-chan, who didn't want to play, was beside her, strategizing.

Shiro-chan was to Momo's immediate left. He liked to do everything with her, a fact that made her captain somewhat jealous.

"Momo, do you have any three's?" Captain Aizen said. He was on her immediate right. Momo handed over two cards. Captain Aizen crowed with excitement. He had yet another book.

Her captain appeared to be around five or six years old. His glasses were too big for his face, but he needed them to see and refused to buy a new pair.** (A/N Yes, I know that he actually doesn't need them. Ignore it. It's for the purposes of cuteness.)** He was constantly pushing them back up so he could see, an action that was both really funny and really cute. Momo wished she could preserve this moment fore-

Suddenly, a camera landed in her lap, thrown expertly by Nanao Ise, who had been watching.

"Why don't we use the cameras to snap photos of the captains like this? If we publish them in a book, or maybe a calendar, we'd still get money. I've been telling the others too…" Nanao was already back to work.

Momo turned on the camera. Nanao had already taken several pictures. One was of Captain Kyoraku as a child, trying to see while wearing his signature hat, drowning in his pink kimono. He was smiling toothily at the camera.

She smiled and looked at another one.

"Momo! It's your turn!" Shiro-chan said, tugging on her sleeve.

"Oh! Sorry, guys," she said, picking up her cards. "Um, Captain Unohana, do you have any two's?"

Unohana giggled. "Go fish!"

Momo smiled and reached into the pile. She got a two, actually. One more and she'd have a book.

"Miss Momo, do you have any two's?" Captain Kuchiki asked, smiling evilly.

Momo sighed and handed over her three two's. "This isn't fair, you guys are ganging up on me!" she exclaimed, pretending to be upset.

The others laughed as they assured her that they weren't.

She turned her attention back to the camera. It was of Captain Kyoraku, still playing dress-up, his arm slung over the shoulders of Captain Ukitake. Both seemed to be laughing wildly at the camera.

She glanced up at the two of them. Captain Kyoraku was complaining that Ukitake was getting all of the good cards. She smiled as Captain Ukitake handed him a "good card." They were best friends. Still prone to fights, as Nanao told her, but they'd always made up in the end.

She flipped to another one. Of the two little captains wrestling about. Another one, of Captain Kyoraku pinning Captain Ukitake. Captain Ukitake was laughing, his face toward the camera, as he tried to break free of Captain Kyoraku's hold. Captain Kyoraku was…oh. He looked like he was trying to spit in Captain Ukitake's face. Must be a boy thing.

Momo glanced up as Captain Aizen started shouting. The game was over, and he'd won. Momo clicked the camera back to picture-taking mode.

_Click._

She'd got it! She'd gotten Captain Aizen while he was jumping around. One fist was raised in the air, and his glasses were dangerously close to falling off. They were down by his cheeks and hanging by one ear. Perfect.

She glanced over at Captain Zaraki. He was looking at the group. Momo walked over to him.

"Do you want to play in the next one, Captain Zaraki?"

"No! I want to get out of this stupid room so I can go and be with people who want me!" Captain Zaraki said angrily.

"Now, that's not true, Captain." Momo said gently. "We were playing a game, and it's not fun if you don't play fair."

Zaraki huffed.

Momo had an idea.

"Nanao, how about we get Ikkaku Madarame or Yumichika Ayasegawa to help tomorrow?"

"One of them? Oh, no, they'd destroy my division." Nanao said, looking up.

"Not if they didn't have anyone to fight. Besides, they'd be good at keeping order." Momo pointed out. Which was true. Ikkaku, especially, was frightening. He'd have the children cowering into submission.

Nanao looked thoughtful. "Well… Yumichika Ayasegawa has been running the Eleventh Division lately… Who knows where Ikkaku is. It wouldn't hurt for Ikkaku to pull his weight for Soul Society for once."

It certainly wouldn't be ideal for Nanao, but at least Captain Zaraki looked pleased at the prospect. Only one thing…

"Nanao, you'll have to get him here, though. Between the two of us, you're more frightening than he is."

Nanao sighed. She looked at the clock. "Well, the day is almost over, anyway. Everyone should be coming to pick up their captains. If he shows up to pick up Zaraki, then I'll tell him."

"Great!" Momo smiled. "This has actually been a lot of fun. Though," she said, looking at her own unfinished paperwork, "I didn't get very much done."

"If Ikkaku pans out, then I won't need you to come in tomorrow. But I would still appreciate some help in the next week or so." Nanao said.

"Of course! Captain Aizen really liked playing with everyone! Maybe we could have the lieutenants alternate shifts every day!" Momo said happily. Ikkaku tomorrow, then maybe Rangiku the next. That would make Shiro-chan happy…

"We probably shouldn't make Isane do it. She's up to her neck in work as it is." Nanao started.

There was a knock on the door. Lieutenant Isane came in.

"Speak of the devil…" Nanao said. Isane looked affronted.

She didn't really stick around long to chat; Isane picked up a sleepy Unohana. Nanao snapped a photo before the two set off.

One by one, the lieutenants came by to pick up their captains. Renji Abarai came, stayed long enough for Nanao to hand him a camera and explain the new babysitting gig, and left with Byakuya Kuchiki in tow. Captain Ukitake decided to spend the night with Captain Kyoraku. Finally, both Yumichika and Ikkaku arrived to get their captain. Momo didn't stick around to listen to that conversation. She left with Aizen holding her hand and Shiro-chan in her spare arm. She dropped Shiro-chan off at the 10th division, where she woke up Rangiku, who had apparently exhausted herself doing paperwork. Who knew?

Momo and Aizen went home. Momo couldn't help but marvel at how smart Captain Aizen was. He was incredibly smart for the child he was. He liked to read Harry Potter and could even comprehend his old duties, though they weren't appealing to him anymore. He loved to walk around Soul Society. He also really seemed to take a liking to Gin Ichimaru. Momo had tried to find him so that the two could play together, but Gin was becoming quite infamous with everything that he's been doing with Yachiru. He and Yachiru were out of sight unless they were pulling their "pranks." Paranoia was widespread. Momo remembered their little "Soon." scheme. She thought back to something interesting that Renji had told her…

* * *

><p>Renji Abarai and Izuru Kira were eating lunch together in the 6th division cafeteria.<p>

"I tell you what; I never knew that lieutenants had to do so much. This has been the first time in a while where I've had a free lunch break. I owe you an apology. I figured lieutenants get it easy being able to boss everyone around." Renji was complaining, as usual.

"Captain Kuchiki is notorious for making his lieutenant do a lot of work. And it's trying times. It'll get better." Kira tried to reassure him. The load wasn't light for him either, probably, but Renji could see that Kira was trying to make the best of things.

"That's easy for you to say, your captain isn't hounding you with work all day. I have to drop him off at Nanao's just to get some me time." Renji forgot his compliment.

"'Hounding?'" Kira broke out in hysterical laughter.

"What's the matter with you? Ya havin' a fit or somethin'?"

Kira became serious. "My captain has been…well, he's been…"

A spurt of childish giggles came from nowhere.

"Huh? Who's that?" Renji looked around. The sound of heavy breathing came next. It was coming from...Kira's direction. Renji looked over at him.

His eyes were wide, and he was clutching at his chest.

"Whoa, Kira man, calm down." He looked like he was having a heart attack.

"It's them!"

"Who? Come on, it's probably Yachiru or Unohana. It's nothing to get shook up over." Renji uncomfortably patted Kira's shoulder.

"No! I've got to go…" Kira stood and ran for the door. He skidded to a stop.

"Wait! There's safety in numbers. I should be safe in here." He started to sit down.

"Wait! But they might do something to everyone then! I've got to make a run for it!" Kira, near tears at that point, dashed out the door.

"What was that about…" Renji started eating again.

Giggles came again. Yachiru and Captain Ichimaru stepped out.

"Wow, you were right, Smiley! He is afraid!"

"Classical conditioning, Yachiru. We've got him now. We can use this…" Gin laughed and walked off.

Renji shook his head. Poor Kira.

* * *

><p>Momo shook herself out of her thoughts. She had fed Captain Aizen and he was reading by himself in a chair. Momo sat with him for a while. She finished the paperwork that she'd brought with her, that she'd intended to do while she was in the 8th division. By the time she finished, it was bedtime. Momo was so exhausted that she decided to go to bed too.<p>

During this month, it had been decided that Momo would move into her captain's house so she could take care of him. As she lay in the darkness of her new room, she tried to get to sleep. A storm was brewing. She tossed and turned. Suddenly, her door opened and light flooded into her room. It was her captain.

"Momo?" He whispered.

"Y-yes, Captain?" she said, rising from her bed.

"I'm sorry, but is it possible that I could sleep with you? The storm is keeping me awake, and I-are you okay?"

Momo's face had turned beet red.

"Um, what if I just read to you so you'd fall asleep? Would that be okay?"

"But…"

Momo had already taken him by the hand and led him back to his own room.

"Now, what part were you on in Harry Potter?"

"Book two, chapter two." She smiled. So smart. He'd gotten through the first one already.

She picked up the book from the nightstand. She made her captain take off his glasses and lay down.

"Okay. Chapter Two: Dobby's Warning. Harry managed not to shout out, but it was a close thing. The little creature on the bed…"

* * *

><p>Laugh if you'd like. I'm a major Harry Potter freak. I have an awesome Time Turner that I bought on Etsy. So there. In other news, I finally solved my puzzle. I got it apart, and put it back together. I hate that stupid thing. I've had it for about a month, and I was really close, multiple times, to just using it as a paperweight or tossing it in the trash. :(<p>

In case you don't know, classical conditioning is a form of learning. It's best demonstrated by Pavlov. He had a dog that he taught to salivate at the sound of a bell. It worked like this: Pavlov rang a bell, and then immediately exposed the dog to food, triggering saliva glands. Eventually, the dog learned that bell=food, and would begin to salivate as soon as he heard the bell. Thus, Kira has learned that giggling=danger. Gin is a little psychotic, I think. Maybe _sadistic _is the right word.

I wasn't going to release a chapter today, but I forced myself to sit down and write a chapter before I would let myself eat. So, enjoy.


	13. The Kids Are Alright

I was going to release it yesterday, but I had an algebra test. And I had to get my car's registration renewed. So writing and releasing a new chapter would have violated my policy of "do two productive things, maximum, per day." Sorry. Anyway, this is the second-to-last chapter. And, notice, this is a super, super, super mega chapter! YAY! It's over double what mine normally are. I have no idea how long the last chapter will be(I've seriously procrastinated writing it), so consider this a pre-apology.

Please review. Come on. It's not so difficult. Don't you want to make me happy? Two chapters left, and I would be ever-so-pleased if I could reach 100 reviews.

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><p>The Experiment<p>

Chapter 13: The Kids Are Alright

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><p><strong>Day 28<strong>

Ikkaku stirred. He felt…like crap. His head was aching. The effects of a hangover. God, it was too early. Barely dawn. But today was the day he was supposed to babysit the captains with Nanao. Ugh. This was the third time he'd had to do it, too. Why couldn't they get someone else? Someone who actually cares about the brats.

Groaning, he made himself sit up. He sat on the edge of the bed and leaned over. He put his head in his hands. Hair brushed over his hands.

…What?

He quickly got up and moved over to his mirror.

He shrieked at the sight of himself.

* * *

><p>Somewhere very far away, Ichigo Kurosaki jerked his head up. "Rukia, I think I heard a hollow!" The door to his closet slid open. Rukia Kuchiki looked at her pager. "There haven't been any alerts. Anyway, I don't hear or feel anything. Go back to sleep." Ichigo lay back down. He was probably just imagining things.<p>

* * *

><p>He was Yumichika. No…wait. He blinked and looked closer. He was himself.<p>

"Ikkaku?" Yumichika had crashed into his room. "What the hell's the matter? Wait…Why are you wearing my spare wig and feathers?"

Ikkaku tugged on them frantically. They wouldn't come off. He reached his zanpakuto.

Yumichika grabbed Ikkaku's raised arm, desperately trying to restrain him. "No! Don't! Do you have any idea how much those feathers cost?" Yumichika shouted.

"_Who did this?"_ Ikkaku asked, grabbing Yumichika's robes by the front.

"Ikkaku, stop, I don't know-"

"_Who has access to your room?_"

"Me, you, the Captain, until recently Renji, the Fourth Division…" Yumichika stopped. "Oh…"

"_Who?"_

Yumichika met his eyes. "I've seen Yachiru in there a couple times."

Ikkaku released Yumichika. "That stupid kid! I'll get her to fix this! Wait…she got something from that clown to make sure it doesn't come off!"

"My, my, you're actually thinking for a change." Yumichika was shocked. "I have to say, though, you're _not_ beautiful at all…"

"Shut up! Go to the Twelfth and get me something to get this off of me or I'll cut it off!"

"I'm running the Eleventh, remember? I have to go. Besides, don't worry about your reputation." Yumichika gestured toward the door.

Dozens of Eleventh Division shinigami were gawking at him.

"What are you looking at, huh? Wanna die twice?" Ikkaku snarled at the subordinates. Cursing, he pushed past them and made his way to the Twelfth Division.

* * *

><p>"What happened to-"<p>

"_Don't._" Ikkaku interrupted Nanao. He sat down heavily on the floor. Sure enough, the Twelfth division managed to find a solution to use on the glue binding the wig to Ikkaku's head. Unfortunately, it had burned him, turning his head a very noticeable red. Ikkaku was actually informed that it was lucky that he was bald; the solution would have destroyed any hair he had. The shinigami who had told him that had paid dearly. The wig was destroyed.

"Hey! Lobster Head!" Kyoraku called. He and Ukitake were snickering.

Ikkaku stood up. He picked Kyoraku up by the back of his robes.

"Yes?" Ikkaku asked, staring him in the face. Kyoraku squeaked.

"N-nothing!"

"Let go of him!" Ukitake kicked Ikkaku in the shins. Ikkaku turned his gaze to the boy down below. He gently set Kyoraku down to the ground.

Ukitake's face was fearful. He grabbed Kyoraku's hand and they went off to find a corner to play by themselves.

Toshiro Hitsugaya and Byakuya Kuchiki were here again today, too. They meekly joined Kyoraku and Ukitake.

The only one left was Kenpachi Zaraki, who was openly laughing at the other children. Ikkaku sat down beside him.

"I can't wait until this is over… I need some sake. Anyway, what do you wanna do, Captain?"

The morning passed slowly. Ikkaku and Captain Zaraki arm-wrestled and tossed balls around. The other kids sat quietly together, taking turns reading aloud or whispering mutinous thoughts. Nanao labored through work. The cycle was broken sometimes by shinigami shouting messages through the locked door, or shoving paperwork under it.

It was only until Nanao had gotten up to collect the latest paperwork off of the floor that Captain Hitsugaya stood. "Miss Nanao, can I go pee?"

She glanced at the clock. Already? Oh well. She didn't want to clean up an accident. "All right. Ikkaku. Bathroom break."

Ikkaku looked up. "Finally. Take 'em and go." He was going to tear apart this office while they were gone to find some sort of alcohol Kyoraku had stashed away while he was an adult.

Nanao's look said she knew this. "_Another_ child I have to look after? No, you're coming with me."

Ikkaku's job was to allow himself to be bound to the boys and take them to the boys' room. Ikkaku hotly refused.

"I can take care of 'em without stupid Kido, thanks."

Sure enough, the boys were as docile as ducklings as they walked freely behind Ikkaku like ducklings. Nanao and Unohana departed for the girls' room.

They crowded inside the boys' room. It was a narrow room with only one stall. Toshiro went first. Ikkaku leaned against the closed door.

"Hey…Lobster Head…" Kyoraku spoke suddenly. Ikkaku suppressed the urge to hit the child. He ignored him.

"Hey…listen."

Toshiro came out. Rather than listen to Kyoraku, Ikkaku shoved him toward the empty stall. "Go."

Kyoraku didn't move. He smiled evilly at Ikkaku.

"What're you waiting for? I'm not going to clean you up if you piss yerself, ya know. Nanao can't make me do it…"

Rather than replying, Kyoraku held out a small bottle of sake.

Ikkaku stared. "Where'd you get that?"

"Ask me no questions and I'll tell you no lies. Let's just say that what Nanao doesn't know won't hurt her." Kyoraku said slyly.

At that moment Ikkaku seriously considered the idea that Kyoraku wasn't as childish as he acted.

"Want it? Promise to be nice."

Ikkaku made a grab for it. Kyoraku held it away, and the other boys crowded in front of him, protecting.

"Fine! I promise. Give me that!" Ikkaku swiped at it again, and this time Kyoraku let him have it. He uncorked the bottle and took a long swig.

"Now, you wanted to go, so go!" Ikkaku snarled. Kyoraku didn't move.

"Well? What are you waitin'…?" Ikkaku trailed off. The floor swam. He felt himself swaying.

Ikkaku collapsed.

* * *

><p>"Nice job, Shunsui." Jushiro complimented him.<p>

"Thank Retsu for getting the sleeping pills." As soon as they'd heard Momo suggesting that Ikkaku babysit them, they'd made a plan. The main part of it being that Retsu would sneak stuff that'd make Ikkaku fall asleep out of the Fourth Division, and Shunsui would find the sake. It took a week for it to come to fruition, but everyone was gloating at their cunning.

"Is he gonna be okay?" Kenpachi looked confused. He was the only one not in on the plan. But he would still be a part of the aftermath.

"He'll be fine. Let's go, everyone." Byakuya commanded.

* * *

><p>Nanao walked impatiently toward the boy's room. Unohana had taken a long time to pee. Long enough that the boys should be done.<p>

Nanao knocked on the door. No answer.

She knocked louder, faster. Nothing.

She listened, but heard only silence from within.

Not good. She gingerly opened the door. She found Ikkaku sprawled on the floor, drenched in the smell of sake. A spilled bottle lay nearby.

Worse still… the boys were nowhere to be seen. She repressed the urge to curse and knelt down beside Ikkaku. She shook him. Again. And again.

Finally, she leaned back a bit and delivered a sound slap to his face.

Ikkaku stirred a little at that.

"Whos'ere(Who's there?)"

"What happened to you? You got drunk and you let the boys go?"

Ikkaku's bleary eyes shifted past her. "Yer one to talk…"

"What?" She asked.

But Ikkaku had sunk back into unconsciousness. She slapped him again, but he didn't react.

One to talk? What does he…

She looked behind her. Unohana wasn't there.

* * *

><p><strong>AN ***Ominous music*

You probably should have learned with Gin and Yachiru, but even children can be evil geniuses. But even being masterminds behind twisted schemes, they're still cute. Right?

* * *

><p>"Okay! I'm here! Where's Sosuke?" Retsu asked, running up to the group. They were hiding at the rendezvous point, a corridor near the Tenth division.<p>

"Here." Sosuke Aizen stepped out from behind Kenpachi Zaraki.

"Great! Was it hard getting away from Miss Momo? Too bad we couldn't bring her with us…" Unohana pouted.

"She'd only bring us down. _Anyway_, we don't know what to do." Shunsui cut in.

The group, consisting of Sosuke Aizen, Retsu Unohana, Shunsui Kyoraku, Jushiro Ukitake, Byakuya Kuchiki, Toshiro Hitsugaya, and Kenpachi Zaraki, gathered together and thought.

"Why don't we get the other captains? Kaname and Sajin and Soi Fon and Gin? They could play with us…" Toshiro suggested quietly. He'd moved over by Retsu and clutched her sleeve.

"Sounds good!" Jushiro grinned. "The Ninth is nearby anyway. Sajin and Kaname should be together, since they're friends."

"Move out!" Shunsui ordered. They trooped off toward the Ninth.

* * *

><p>"Sir! A Hell Butterfly from Mayuri Kurotsuchi!" Sasakibe bowed to his captain.<p>

"What does it say?" Yamamoto asked.

"Sir, 'I have developed a solution to my experiment. I will only administer it on the conditions that I be completely pardoned for any wrongdoing on my part that may or may not have taken place during the past thirty days. Only when documents with the seal of Head Captain Genryusai Yamamoto and that of the Central 46 have been delivered to the Department of Research and Development will I deliver the correct antidote. Be warned, a quick decision is recommended; the effects of my original potion may be permanent without a hasty reply.' End message." The Hell Butterfly flew away.

"This is very concerning. I will have to consider this." Yamamoto didn't move for a long time. Sasakibe stayed where he was. You never knew if the old man was sleeping or not.

Forty minutes later, there was a knock on the door.

"Sir, the Central 46 has drafted and signed letters of pardon for one Mayuri Kurotsuchi. They require your seal as well." Yamamoto's third seat's voice came from outside the door.

"We…will have to acquiesce. Bring them in." Yamamoto signed the papers.

"Gather the captains."

The third seat didn't move. He looked nervous. "They're…they're missing, sir."

"WHAT?" Yamamoto opened his eyes.

* * *

><p>After two hours of sneaking around the Seireitei, the group had been gathered. All eleven captains who had been turned into children were there. Yachiru was included, too. She and Gin were joined at the hip.<p>

"Okay. We've done that. Now what?" Byakuya asked.

Shunsui shrugged. "Beats me."

"WHAT? Then what was the point of this, you stupid-" Byakuya raged.

"Hey! We're in this together. Remember?" Shunsui scolded.

"Aww! This is no fun. We should have just stayed at the Ninth. We planted a false positive pregnancy test in the Tenth division's office bathroom. We were gonna tell Hisagi to look there." Gin explained to Toshiro. Toshiro looked confused, then grinned. **(A/N For the purposes of humor, Hisagi and Rangiku are paired.)**

"HEY! Found them!" A shinigami shouted. He'd appeared at the end of the street, and called out to his team. Running footsteps could be heard.

The children looked at each other, stricken.

"Scatter!" Byakuya ordered. **(A/N Get it? Byakuya's shikai release is 'scatter'. Aren't I clever?)**

They scattered. Sajin Komamura grabbed Kaname Tosen and ran off. Most of the others paired up, too: Retsu Unohana and Toshiro Hitsugaya, Gin Ichimaru and Yachiru Kusajishi, Jushiro Ukitake and Shunsui Kyoraku.

Soi Fon, who'd reluctantly gone out with the group after they repeatedly begged, ran off before anyone could team up with her. Even with her powers nullified, she was still the fastest among the group. She wasn't alone, though. A cat the color of shadows pursued her.

Sosuke Aizen ran off alone, too. Byakuya Kuchiki and Kenpachi Zaraki looked at each other for a second longer. Byakuya cursed and said, "Come on!"

And they ran off toward Byakuya's manor.

* * *

><p>"Sajin! Sajin! Stop for a second!" Kaname has been basically dragged for the past few minutes. At long last they slowed to a halt. They were both panting.<p>

"Why…why are we running?" Kaname gasped.

"…why?" Sajin said slowly.

"What's the point? The worst they'll do to us is just put us with the others with Nanao." Kaname explained wisely.

"I see. Okay. Want to turn ourselves in?"

"Okay."

And together, with their hands still clasped together, reversed and ran back from whence they came.

* * *

><p>Unohana and Toshiro weren't having much fun, either. Running for no apparent reason didn't appeal to them, either, but it was still a sort of game. They'd stopped running for their freedom and were mostly wandering. Every time they heard loud footsteps they'd turn corners, or hide in alleyways.<p>

Unohana tripped. They were both getting tired. Toshiro stooped to make sure she didn't scrape her knee. He glanced up. He heard shouting voices again.

"This area's clear, Ma'am!"

Being called 'Ma'am' implied leadership, and an obviously female one. Toshiro frowned. They were probably still in the Tenth Division. They had mostly run in circles to confuse their pursuers. So the 'Ma'am' they were referring to was probably Rangiku.

Toshiro knew that he probably should feel pleased, because she'd be fun to torment. But he couldn't. Mostly it was because she'd changed so much in the past month. She'd started off as an annoying creature who made him pose for photos and gave him embarrassing hugs. One who fed him weird food and piggybacked him everywhere. Okay, it wasn't _that_ bad. Doing that stupid stuff made her happy, and he was always happy to see her happy. But she wasn't anymore. She looked so tired.

Unohana had led him into a quiet alleyway. They were crouched down. Unohana was trying to cover his white hair with her hands so it wouldn't be a dead giveaway.

"FOUND YOU!"

The duo looked up. A burly shinigami had appeared at the end of the alley. Unohana stood and grabbed Toshiro's hand, pulling him along away from the shinigami.

"Hey! Come back here! Hey, guys! I found some! It's the captain!"

The two ran away, away from the main roads and down thinner paths. They didn't dare look behind them. They could feel their pursuers gaining. They took lefts and rights at random. This ultimately led to their demise, as they eventually found themselves in…

"A dead end." Unohana said. She glanced behind her. The shinigami were seconds away. They looked at each other.

"Captain!" Rangiku stepped into view. Unohana looked at Toshiro and clutched his hand tighter. If they could just distract her for a moment. They were small enough, they could slip by…

Toshiro was dumbstruck by Rangiku's appearance. He looked at what he had done to her. Her eyes had dark shadows under them, and they'd lost their normal brightness. Her hair was dull. She looked gaunt. So this is what Rangiku looks like after a month of pressure.

"Toshiro, let's…" Unohana began whispering.

Rangiku stepped forward. She fell to her knees.

"Please…please Captain…" She started crying. Toshiro didn't know what to do.

"Please…come with me. I need you to come with me…"

"Why?" Toshiro couldn't help himself.

"Because Kurotsuchi has a cure and he wants to give it to you. I can't take this anymore." Rangiku's head was bent forward, but Toshiro could see a tear fall to the dirt.

He looked at Unohana. Her wide eyes were fixed on Rangiku. He knew what he had to do. He let go of Unohana's hand and stepped forward.

He stopped in front of Rangiku. She looked up at him with teary eyes. She hugged him tightly.

"Okay, Matsumoto…"

Rangiku cried at him using her last name, hugging him even tighter, if possible.

* * *

><p>"Wow…this place's huge." Kenpachi looked around him.<p>

"Don't touch anything." Byakuya said tersely.

"I wasn't! I was just…wait…what're you doin'?" Kenpachi noticed Byakuya, who was knocking on his walls.

"The SWA have meetings in my manor. I'm trying to find a place to hide."

"Good idea…but some girl lieutenants are lookin' for us. They'll look for us there."

"Not for a while. Just shut up."

Kenpachi flopped onto the couch, face down.

"Psst! Ken-chan!"

"Yachiru?" Kenpachi raised his head.

"Hi, Ken-chan!" A panel on a wall slid up, revealing the smiling face of Yachiru. Gin's soon popped out above it.

"So that's where it is…" Byakuya muttered.

Yachiru giggled. "This is where _one_ of the entrances is. Wanna hide with us?"

Distant voices could be heard. Byakuya moved to the windows and glanced out. He quickly ducked away from them and squatted down.

"They saw me."

"Well, I guess hiding with us is out. Let's go, Yachiru." Gin said cheerfully.

"Wait! What about me!" Kenpachi protested.

"Come on, Smiley. Let's take Ken-chan with us!" Yachiru chimed in.

The voices were getting louder.

"No way, three's a crowd, 'Chiru. See ya later." Gin stepped out of the hidey-hole. "The back door's this way, right Bya-kun?" He called.

"…yes." Byakuya said. But Gin was gone.

"Come on, Ken-chan! Let's play!" Yachiru and Kenpachi dashed off together. Byakuya got up and closed the panel. "I should try and remember where this is…"

Ugh. The footsteps were getting louder, no doubt damaging the floors. Some servants were already protesting. Byakuya stayed where he was.

"Ah! Captain Kuchiki!"

* * *

><p>Gin sighed. Now that Yachiru was gone, there was nothing left to do.<p>

He walked, whistling, towards the Third Division.

* * *

><p>Unbeknownst to almost everyone, Aizen wasn't interested in "play time." Through strength of will, he'd managed to retain much of his maturity. He could sense that things were drawing to a close and now it was time to make sure that he'd still gain something out of it. After all, he'd already wasted the past month...<p>

So after he'd separated from the others, he'd run straight for the Fifth Division. Momo was already about, searching high and low for him.

He'd launched himself into Momo's arms as soon as he saw her. It was all an act, of course. Benevolent, compassionate Captain Aizen. Cute, wide-eyed Sosuke. His adult mind told him exactly how he should appear.

That was why, when Momo had at last let go of him, the first thing he did was rub his eyes, look sleepy, and say, "Can we read Chapter Twelve now instead of at bedtime?"

Of course that made Momo squeal with delight. What a pest. She'd already pulled out the stupid camera and was snapping photos.

She started jabbering on about how they were going to cure him. Ah, well. It seems his suspicions were right. It was time to grow up, literally.

* * *

><p>Soi Fon crouched in a dark alleyway. It was damp and filthy. She clutched "Kitty" in her arms, and sniffled occasionally.<p>

Yoruichi didn't know what to do. It was clear that all the searchers wanted was for the captains to return to normal. But it's not like it was an adult Soi Fon they were trying to reason with. This Soi Fon was terrified to the very core of being in trouble.

Squirming, she freed herself from Soi Fon's tiny grasp. She used her luring technique to lead Soi Fon around a corner and into a nearby deserted room. Soi Fon had had to stretch to reach the knob. Once inside, Yoruichi pressed her body against the door to seal them both inside.

And then Yoruichi shifted.

Bright light temporarily pervaded the room and faded, leaving spots in Soi Fon's eyes. When they cleared, she could dimly see a familiar face.

A sudden red Kido illuminated the room. Yoruichi's features became clear.

Yoruichi watched as shock crossed the little girl's face. Realization, shock, and fear and finally anger. Her eyes became guarded and her face took on a look that no child should ever had.

"You…"

"Me."

"I…get away from me!" Soi Fon took a step backward.

Yoruichi kneeled in front of the girl and wrapped her in an embrace. She smiled against Soi Fon's shoulder. "So, are you thinking clearly again? It was nice while it lasted."  
>Soi Fon couldn't break her grip.<p>

"Soi Fon…putting aside how you feel right now, you need to listen to me. The people who are searching for you are trying to make you an adult again. That's right…so you can hate me properly. I deserve it, probably."

Soi Fon was slack in her arms.

"Do you understand, little bee? You can't stay a child forever, as much as I want you to. You've done a great job of leading the Second Division after me. Remember? Your vacation is over. Your division needs you."

Yoruichi felt moisture on her shoulder from Soi Fon's tears.

"Yeth, Lady Yoruichi."

* * *

><p>"Yay! Come on, Ken-chan!"<p>

"Which way?"

"Ummm….this way, definitely this way!" It was just like old times. They weren't going anywhere in particular, but Yachiru still liked to lead them around.

"Maybe we should find Baldy! He's fun!" Yachiru exclaimed.

"He's drugged somewhere in a bathroom."

"Aww…"

They ducked around another alley.

"Nothing over here!"

"Damn it, where are they?" A frustrated voice yelled. "Don't they know everyone wants them so they can get a cure so they can stop being BRATS!"

The kids had slowed down so that their footsteps wouldn't make noise. They now halted and looked at each other.

Kenpachi, the oldest and biggest. His hair was no longer spiked, and his face had lost all the scars he'd gained over the years. His haori and zanpakuto were gone. He was a mere memory of his youth.

As if to contradict this idea, Yachiru stood in contrast in front of him. The same as always, her pink hair and goofy smile made him remember exactly who he was supposed to be. He was Kenpachi Zaraki, the unbeatable. The one that everyone fears. He was Yachiru's playmate and protector. He wasn't a kid.

"Come on, Yachiru. Let's go."

* * *

><p>Shunsui and Jushiro were idly sitting on a rooftop. No one figured that kids who couldn't shunpo could get on top of a building. They underestimated their determination.<p>

So far, no one had thought to look _up._

"Shunsui?"

Shunsui's smiling eyes glanced at him. "Yeah, 'Shiro?"

"We know what they want to do to us…so what's the big deal?"

Shunsui thought for a moment. He exhaled slowly. "Yeah. You're right. This game is getting kinda boring."

"…Wanna go find Nanao?"

"Nah, we're in the Eleventh. Might as well just climb down and wait."

"No need for that."

The boys turned at the sound of a new voice.

"Yumichika Ayesagawa? I think at least…"

"Correct. Come along, you two."

* * *

><p>The captains of Soul Society sat in the Twelfth Division. Though they were mere ghosts of their former selves, they still held a semblance of their old personalities. As such, most had surrendered <em>themselves<em> to this treatment.

They were all in various moods. Acceptance, for the most part. Byakuya Kuchiki was seething a bit. Gin Ichimaru and Sosuke Aizen were jovial. Retsu Unohana seemed pensive, probably her fear of needles. Her lieutenant sat, comforting her. Isane held a lollipop out to her, something that Toshiro Hitsugaya looked at longingly. Isane smiled and got another piece of candy for Toshiro, who snatched it and gave a muffled thanks to Isane.

Rangiku Matsumoto redirected his attention back to her. She, along with other lieutenants, was trying to get a few last minute snapshots. Momo Hinamori leaped into the scene and hugged Toshiro, who had a distinct "yuck" expression on his face.

Soi Fon and Byakuya Kuchiki were reluctantly paired up for a few shots. The pictures were ruined by their moody faces.

"May I have the room's attention, please?" Mayuri Kurotsuchi spoke.

"Each of the captains must go into a separate room. From there, they must dress in larger sizes to avoid ruined clothing. Has everyone brought spare clothes?" Mayuri looked around. In answer, the various caretakers held up items of clothing.

"Good. If we can get this over with." Mayuri looked away with a sour look on his face. He was miffed that no one would give him any blood samples.

Nanao Ise took one last photo of Soi Fon, who looked like she'd been crying. Nanao led her to the appropriate room, ignoring Omaeda, who felt it was his job. The idiot.

"Captain Kurotsuchi…How exactly will the drug be administered?" Isane Kotetsu approached him, Unohana in tow.

"A gas." Kurotsuchi gave her a disparaging glance.

Isane smiled in relief, though. "Hear that, Captain? No needles." Both Unohana and Toshiro, who'd trailed along after them, relaxed.

Five minutes of chaos later, the second experiment took place.


	14. How It Ended

I wrote this story because it'd been in my head for a while and it was driving me insane. Seriously, I couldn't get to sleep one night because I was thinking about it, so I got up and wrote the first couple chapters at three in the morning. Over the past month or so, yeah, there were a bunch of times where I didn't know what to have happen. I definitely didn't know how it'd end. So, I've developed a sort of empathy when it comes to scrapped stories. Life gets in the way, or a really bad case of writer's block. It's difficult to push through, and some stories just don't have viable endings. I get it now.

I'm not the greatest writer in the world. I know my flaws. If I were better, I'd make the characters have more depth and make my sentences less plain. I'd add more imagery and description. While I wouldn't call my story an epic full of adventure and romance and the old ultraviolence, I really did enjoy writing it! I'd like to thank my reviewers(I'd mention you all, but it'd turn this little Author's Note into a big block of text when in reality you guys a)Know who you are and b) want me to get on with the story.). You guys really helped me finish this. Despite my complaints about "Oh, I got only 6 reviews that time? Pick up the pace guys!" I do appreciate every single one of your comments. I'm always so critical of my work, and developing so many followers over the course of this has taught me that I take myself and everything that I do _way_ too seriously. You've made a dream that I had develop into a story that I actually like. Thanks for taking a chance on my story.

* * *

><p>The Experiment<p>

Chapter 14: How It Ended

* * *

><p><strong>Day 1<strong>

Isane had been napping near the room her captain was in. Other captains had awoken and left in various states of confusion and anger. Captain Soi Fon looked like she thought her entire ordeal had been one long dream, while Byakuya Kuchiki had been surprisingly emotional. Not the weepy kind of emotional, the I'm-going-to-kill-the-next-person-who-touches-me kind of emotional. None of the captains were up to full power, so he couldn't do anything to Captain Kurotsuchi. Poor Captain Hitsugaya, now his normal child age, was still asleep when his lieutenant gently carried him back to his own division.

Isane's eyes snapped open. The door her captain was in had opened.

"Isane?"

Her head jerked up towards the voice. Retsu Unohana stood there, smiling down at her.

Isane burst into tears.

Before long, she felt warm hands lift her up so that she was standing. She heard her captain murmer thank yous. She was slowly being led out of the Twelfth Division. She couldn't stop crying. She'd never realized exactly how much she relied on Captain Unohana to take care of her until she couldn't, and the sight of her captain the same as before had taken such a weight off her shoulders.

Eventually, as they walked, Isane collected herself. Her head hurt terribly. When they arrived at the Fourth Division, they were greeted with a loud roar. Captain Unohana gently led Isane to the office and made her lie down on the couch. She made some tea for Isane, and left.

Isane sat quietly, sipping her tea. Her headache slowly faded away.

"Isane."

Isane jumped, spilling tea. She looked around. A black cat was sitting on the open windowsill.

"Yoruichi?"

"So, everything's back to normal, right?"

"Y-yes. Everyone is expected to make a full recovery of their abilities within a day or two."

The cat nodded and jumped from the frame.

"Do me a favor and don't mention that I was here to Soi Fon, all right? She doesn't need to hurt."

"…All right. Thank you for taking care of her."

Yoruichi would have smiled if she could. "My pleasure."

She flicked her tail towards Isane, jumped through the window, and was gone as quickly as she came.

* * *

><p><strong>Day 2<strong>

Soi Fon was still fairly unsure of what had occurred in the past month. She remembered the first week with relative clarity. Everything after that was like a dream, one that she'd forgotten upon waking. Her zanpakuto(who'd thankfully awoken when Soi Fon did when the experiment ended) had no idea, either, what had happened. Or so she claimed.

"Captain Soi Fon?"

She rose from her thoughts. She was sitting with the rest of the SWA in their meeting room in Byakuya Kuchiki's manor.

"What?"

"Well, the only photos we seem to have of you are ones of you being...well..." _You._ That was the unspoken word. Isane didn't look at her. She'd been avoiding Soi Fon's eyes all afternoon.

Soi Fon glanced at the photos of her. The ones taken in the Twelfth, of course.

The blasted photos. Soi Fon almost refused to take part in this little scheme. She'd threatened her subordinates with pain and suffering if they so much as mentioned the past month to her. Byakuya Kuchiki had said the same, and soon word had spread. It was now completely taboo to speak of it.

The best thing to do was just forget it'd ever happened. But now the SWA wanted to profit, and Soi Fon had little choice but to acquiesce. She reluctantly took out her camera. In it were several embarrassing self-taken photos.

Soi Fon thought back to the discovery of the camera. She'd stumbled back to her quarters and sealed herself inside. She'd gotten some medicine for her head and glanced around the rooms, expecting to find it in total disarray. Instead, it was relatively clean, littered with toys. Several drawings were scattered about, of crude portraits of herself. Curiously, she'd apparently drawn a small black cat in almost all of her drawings. She'd even drawn it having yellow eyes.

_She_ had been on Soi Fon's thoughts before the whole mess took place. Maybe the thoughts of _her_ had been manifested more strongly when she was a child.

She'd burned the drawings and the toys. They were the only things that could be considered trash. Soi Fon was at first surprised at how independent she was over the past month. Even her laundry had been done.

It was too good to be believed.

She'd thoroughly questioned her subordinates _why_ exactly someone had been in her rooms. Most didn't know. They'd explained that they'd tried, but someone had apparently already done it. Soi Fon deduced that it'd probably been someone who didn't know any better, so she'd gone to the Fourth Division. Lieutenant Isane had told her that Isane herself had taken the trouble to do it all for her. Isane was a bad liar. She wouldn't meet Soi Fon's eyes. _How_ she was lying, exactly, Soi Fon couldn't tell.

"Captian, what's this?" Momo Hinamori's voice shook Soi Fon out of her reverie.

Her camera was passed to her. It was a self-taken photo, of course. But what… there, in the top left hand corner of the photo, beyond Soi Fon's smiling face, was a black line. It looked like a…tail.

Soi Fon's breathing stopped. Could it be?

"What? What is it?" Isane nervously called out. Soi Fon glanced up at her. The look on Isane's face told her that she at least suspected what was in the photo.

No. No, no, no, no, nonono! It wasn't- it wasn't _her._

Soi Fon forced her mind to turn from those thoughts.

She deleted the photo.

"Nothing."

* * *

><p><strong>Day 3<strong>

"C-captain, how are you feeling?" Kira entered the room nervously.

Gin looked up. He'd been fiddling with something instead of doing paperwork. He smiled. "I'm doing just fine, Kira." Kira'd been treading carefully around him. Gin and the other captains had spread the idea that none of them remembered the past month. And also that dismemberment was a possible punishment if someone should ever bring it up to a captain. Still, Kira obviously remembered it. And secretly, so did Gin, but he wasn't going to tell Kira yet.

"Here." Gin handed Kira a stack of paperwork. "Take this to the Ninth."

Kira started to shuffle out the door.

Okay. Maybe he _would_ tell Kira. In his own way. Gin reached under his desk. It was a tape recorder from the World of the Living. He pressed Play.

The sound of laughing children filled the room.

The effect was immediate. Kira let out a little shriek and looked around the room frantically.

Gin looked innocent. "Something wrong, Kira?"

Kira stared at him for a long moment. "No. Nothing, sir."

Gin noticed, however, that Kira's hands were trembling. He chuckled to himself. He'd lied to Momo when he'd claimed that he'd help Kira. Poor Momo was naïve enough to believe it. Gin was just having a bit of fun. Having such a nervous guy as his lieutenant _did_ have its perks.

* * *

><p><strong>Day 3<strong>

Ukitake sat in the Thirteenth division, slowly sipping his tea and reading reports. Rukia Kuchiki had been due from the World of the Living for almost a week now…he'd have to get someone down there before it became a problem.

"Hey, Jushiro!" A familiar voice called. Ukitake looked up, and smiled at the sight of his old friend, Shunsui Kyoraku.

"Shunsui! Back to normal, I see." Ukitake poured his friend a cup of tea. He coughed slightly. Kyoraku's smile faded.

"As are you."

Ukitake looked a little sad. "Yes… despite everything…"

"…It was nice while it lasted?" Kyoraku finished.

They laughed together. "Bet you enjoyed your little vacation." Ukitake said.

"Poor Nanao didn't. You have no idea what it took to get here. A whole day of sobriety!"

Ukitake gasped in mock horror, and Kyoraku pretended to be deeply hurt. The two old friends laughed again together and sipped at their tea.

* * *

><p><strong>Day 5<strong>

Matsumoto walked into the Tenth Division office. Her captain was, as usual, doing paperwork on the desk.

"Captain! Hey!"

He looked up. "Finally."

He picked up a stack of paperwork from his desk and carried it over to her desk. "I've done some for you. As usual. Please finish."

"Aww, Captain! I can't! I just got back from the Fourth and Isane said that I probably strained my hand from doing all that paperwork! Have I mentioned how much paperwork? I can't do anything with my hand for the next few months, at least, and-"

She finally noticed that Captain Hitsugaya wasn't paying attention to her.

She stepped closer, and what she saw made her heart sink. She'd hoped he wouldn't see this for a couple more days, at least.

There, semi-hidden on her desk under magazines and paperwork, was a picture book. It was this that her captain had noticed, and he was flicking through it... Matsumoto recalled some of the photos she knew it contained.

* * *

><p><strong>Of the Second:<strong>

_A very moody Soi Fon frowning at the camera._

_Self-taken snapshots of Soi Fon smiling toothily at the camera._

**Of the Third:**

_Izuru Kira, only recognizable by his wide eyed expression, covered head to toe with what appeared to be honey, and then feathers._

_Izuru Kira, with a hair style reminiscent of one Kenpachi Zaraki _(Matsumoto giggled internally at that one. Captain Zaraki, who had seen the photo via Yachiru, had stormed up to Kira, screaming "You makin' fun of me? Wanna fight?")._ His face was screaming 'terror.'_

_A close up of Gin and Yachiru with their faces mushed together._

**Of the Fourth:**

_Captain Unohana sitting daintily on a cot in the Healing Ward, smiling cutely at the camera._

**Of the Fifth:**

_Captain Aizen with his glasses about to fall off, grinning widely at something beyond the range of the camera._

**Of the Sixth:**

_Byakuya Kuchiki with a pouty frown on his face, sitting cross-legged, cross-armed in a corner._

**Of the Seventh:**

_Sajin Komamura holding the hand of his lieutenant, looking up at him. Komamura had a makeshift bucket with eyeholes and gloves over his hands._

**Of the Eighth:**

_Shunsui Kyoraku reluctantly standing with his lieutenant Nanao Ise, who had gripped the back of his robes._

**Of the Ninth:**

_Kaname Tosen, his face hardly visible as he slept, using his overlarge haori as a blanket._

**Of the Eleventh:**

_Yachiru Kusajishi trying to jump on the back of Kenpachi Zaraki. _

_Yachiru biting Kenpachi Zaraki._

**Of the Thirteenth:**

_Jushiro Ukitake, sitting on his desk, smiling at the camera while he pretended to do paperwork__**.**_

**Among the others were pairs, friends and enemies alike…**

_Captain Hitsugaya, fast asleep with Captain Unohana._

_Byakuya Kuchiki and Kenpachi Zaraki standing side by side, with disgusted looks on their faces. They were pinching each other._

**Those weren't what he was frowning at. He had his own section, too.**

_Captain Hitsugaya being carried piggy-back style on Matsumoto's shoulders. _

_Hitsugaya eating a lollipop almost as round as his head._

_A close up of Captain Hitusgaya smiling, despite tears streaming down his face and a runny nose._

_Matsumoto trying to give a struggling Hitsugaya one of her famous hugs._

_Hitsugaya clutching a stuffed animal in his sleep._

* * *

><p>"Matsumoto…" Hitsugaya began through gritted teeth. "How many people have seen these?"<p>

"Um…Well, everyone, soon. The SWA's going to publish it. I just got one of the first copies."

The temperature dropped several degrees. Matsumoto, sensing danger, decided to lay it all out.

"Also, the Seireitei Communications got a hold of a few photos. I think they're going to publish some, too."

It was near freezing.

"And…Momo took some copies. She said she was going to go to Jun'rinan to show them to your grandmother. And to expect some amanatto. Which reminds me…"

With frozen fingers, Matsumoto lifted a large basket of (you guessed it) candy onto the desk. A tag proclaimed the gifter to be Jushiro Ukitake.

It was now so cold that the windows shattered. Matsumoto fled.

* * *

><p><strong>Day 5<strong>

Kenpachi Zaraki was sitting in his office, alone. He was hard at work ripping and tearing at his new haori. He'd gotten it this morning, and when he looked at it, he'd realized that it was _too new._ Half an hour later, he admired it from all angles. It looked good. Too white, though. He'd add some dirt or maybe bloodstains later.

"Ken-chan?" A tentative voice called.

"What, Yachiru?" He growled.

"Come play with me!"

"Go play with that smiling coward…" Meaning Gin Ichimaru.

Yachiru's head popped up from outside. She leaned through the open window. She looked thoughtful, and then grinned widely.

"No! I wanna play with Ken-chan!"

Kenpachi grinned. "All right."

A Hell Butterfly floated past Yachiru through the open window towards Kenpachi. He listened for a moment.

"There's a Captain's Meeting."

"Aww…well, that's still fun. Let's go, Ken-chan!"

* * *

><p><strong>Day 5<strong>

"Welcome, captains. It's been a while." Yamamoto turned his gaze towards Mayuri Kurotsuchi, who smiled unabashedly.

"Now, then, on to business. Does anyone have anything to report?"

"Yes. I've decided to appoint Renji Abarai, Sixth Seat of the Eleventh Division, as my lieutenant. Captain Zaraki has acquiesced." Byakuya Kuchiki spoke up. Kenpachi Zaraki grunted in agreement. The two of them had actually been on good terms. Ever since they'd banded together to destroy the Twelfth Division…

"Fine. The official ceremony should take place soon. Speak to me later to confirm details." Yamamoto ordered. "Next?"

"Head Captain, it's been over a week since one of my officers was due from the World of the Living." Jushiro Ukitake stepped forward.

Kuchiki glanced towards him. "Who?" He asked, as if knowing the answer.

Ukitake swallowed. "Rukia Kuchiki. She is stationed in Karakura Town. The hollows found there are still being exorcised, so it appears that she is still physically fine. I felt it necessary to report, but no actions are required as of yet. I'm sending one of my men down to collect her before it becomes problematic." Ukitake concluded.

"Shall we discuss the hollow attacks next? We never did get around to it…" Retsu Unohana smiled at Kurotsuchi, who flinched.

"Ah, yes…ahem, fortunately, no serious attacks took place in the past month. Most were taken care of by your respective lieutenants. I stepped in once to take care of a Menos Grande that was assigned to the Tenth." Kurotsuchi reported.

"Good." Yamamoto said.

Toshiro Hitsugaya bristled. He'd been on edge the whole meeting. He exclaimed, "I'm sorry to speak so rashly, but are we not going to punish _him _for what he's done? He could have collapsed Soul Society!" He pointed a finger directly at Kurotsuchi.

Kurotsuchi tsked. "That's not a part of the plan. Besides, you know that I've been pardoned. And you barbarians," He gestured his head towards Kenpachi Zaraki and Byakuya Kuchiki. "Destroyed half of my division."

"I don't remember signing such an agreement." Kuchiki didn't look at him.

"You complainin'? Want another piece of me?" Zaraki added menacingly.

"Are you kidding, you oaf? You wouldn't last five minutes against me and my creations." Kurotsuchi began smugly.

"Enough!" Yamamoto's cane banged against the hard wooden floor. He looked serious for a moment, and then smiled, a rarity. He thought back to the only Captain's Meeting he dared call during the previous month after the experiment began.

* * *

><p>"Acting Captain, reporting in!" Kiyone said, saluting the Head Captain.<p>

"Grr! No way! I'm Acting Captain!" Sentaro broke in.

"We're co-Acting Captains, stupid!"

"Yeah, but clearly the Captain wanted one of us to be the one to make the decisions here! It's obvious which one it is!"

"Yeah, it's me!" Kiyone said.

"Why, you-"

They continued arguing, even as a loud _thud_ sounded. It was Isane. She'd been wobbling for some time now, but she'd collapsed in a state of exhaustion. Rangiku moved to wake her, but as she bent down she lost her balance and fell on top of Isane, passing out as well. Momo fussed over them.

"What's happening? I can't tell!" Yachiru attempted to climb on the shoulders of Yumichika, tugging his hair and eliciting cries of pain from him. Yachiru was technically the Acting Captain, but Yumichika had gone along as her spokesperson.

Everyone was clamoring. Kiyone and Sentaro were grappling with each other. Nanao tried to restore order while Omaeda just laughed.

Yamamoto twitched. Suddenly, he opened his eyes and released his reiatsu, causing everyone to freeze. It was deathly quiet.

"LEAVE!"

The various Acting Captains' lives flashed before their eyes. They fled, picking up their exhausted comrades and returning to their own divisions.

* * *

><p>Head Captain Yamamoto was just glad to have his captains back. Though they vary widely with their personalities, they were each a significant part of the Gotei 13. Though the whole is truly more than the sum of its parts, Soul Society wasn't complete without each and every one of them. Yamamoto knew, however, that everything that comes together has to fall apart, and he dreaded the inevitable day when the fates would change the Soul Society forever.<p>

* * *

><p>Well, that's it. I'm a huge psychology buff, did you get that? I once took a Psychology class four years ago, back when I was a freshman in high school., and it stuck with me. So that's why Gin psychologically torments Kira, because I think it's fascinating that someone can do it to another person.<p>

I really hope you enjoyed this little story. Don't forget to review this chapter and previous chapters. Be excellent to one another and so long, droogies.


	15. Or Has It?

One more chapter. I don't intend to make a sequel, because like I said, my inspiration comes and goes a lot. But I thought I'd write this. For my readers' pleasure.

* * *

><p>Chapter 15<p>

Or Has It?

* * *

><p>Mayuri Kurotsuchi left the Captain's meeting fuming. What Neanderthals. What monkeys. Every last one of them couldn't compare to his mental prowess.<p>

He managed to stumble back into what remained of the Department of Research and Development. Of course, much of it existed underground, but he was expected to use his own budget for the repairs. Even the Head Captain was turning a blind eye to what those barbarians had done. Perhaps he'd petition the Central 46 for the immediate displacement of Byakuya Kuchiki and Kenpachi Zaraki. Or at the very least, have them fined so they can repair what they damaged.

No, no, that would never work. Besides the fact that Kurotsuchi, scientist and genius, was routinely up for discussion concerning his other experiments, those two fools would simply argue that their mental facilities hadn't completely returned along with their abilities. He'd have to make due with what he had. He'd simply hinder the other divisions in the production of Soul Candies and Soul Pagers. Perhaps "forget" to fixate the walls of the Dangai when Kuchiki was passing through. Who knows.

Morons. Cavemen. As Kurotsuchi picked his way through the debris, he couldn't help but return his thoughts to those incompetent bastards.

He stopped. Cavemen...

All things considered, Kurotsuchi had gotten off lucky this time. Though it really couldn't have gone any other way. Soul Society was petrified of him and his wrath. Well, most. Those that weren't were too stupid to recognize the danger. Would he be able to pull it off a second time?

If those idiots wanted to claim that they were too indisposed to help themselves when they destroyed his lab, that was fine with him. In fact, he encouraged it. He'd help them with it. A barbaric mind to go with their barbaric powers. How's that for revenge?

"Nemu! Fetch my recorder!" He barked. He needed to preserve his thoughts. This would take careful planning, and time...

He began to chuckle to himself, drawing the stares of his subordinates. Many began to shuffle backward toward the nearest exit, which was easy considering there were no more doors.

This...was going to be fun.


End file.
